Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. They thought it'd be hilarious to put on ridiculous accents and act like country hicks, spewing obscenities and strongly hinting that we're into incest. She soon left in disgust. I haven't heard back from her since. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents over lunch. Unfortunately, I showed my dad her Facebook profile beforehand and he wouldn't stop making cracks about her duckfacing. It started with, "Don't let her eat the bread, it'll puff up in her stomach and kill her", and ended in tears. FML
Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML
Today, I brought a girl home. My dad's first reaction was to pull out the camera and snap away. She now won't reply to my texts or calls. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
5secondsofvvifi 21
She really believed it was cocaine? Plus, couldn't you run after her when she excused herself? I myself would probably find that really funny, but that's just me.
dagarr 11
Well looks like ur dad was having some fun
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (87)
BoeingAirbus 4
If she really thought that was real, then she isn't really the brightest bulb in the box and I think you dodged the bullet on this one.
lenalee96 22
If she gets spooked over that she might be looking for reasons to break it off...
FitFriday 32
Your father has an amazing sense of humor!
unicornruler 16
Wow, your gf is really dramatic
Sandsh8rk 36
Why do parents always seem to do their best to **** with their children's relationships?
MeltedMango 8
Hope you got in touch with your girlfriend, OP! To be fair though, that does sound pretty hilarious.
sicksadworld1317 30
Send her a text message or facebook message so she can at least get a glimpse of your explanation rather than blindly ducking your calls. Eventually she'll get curious enough and read the message. How she handles it from there should give you some answers as to whether or not you feel you should continue the relationship. On the bright side, your family sounds awesome!
Arot6 17
I need to remember this for when I have kids.
JLDork 11
to everyone insulting her and calling her over dramatic or saying she has no sense of humour, you're forgetting that you know it's a joke, and have been told what it is. she doesn't know it's not real. he's lucky she didn't call the cops.
Brandi_Faith 34
I completely agree. People seem to be forgetting that she thought it was real, and that there was a whole "shipment." If it was real and the cops busted them, she would've been in trouble too just for being there. Better to be safe than sorry and just stay away from drugs completely. I don't blame her for walking out, but it's weird she isn't answering his calls. She should at least be explaining to op why she can't be with him anymore.
Catdragon 40
unless she's been through it before and doesn't want to again? you seem an awful lot judgemental for someone you don't even know?