Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my mom added me on Facebook. She wrote on my wall, for the whole world to see, "Why are you swearing on the internet?! You're grounded". FML
You OK hon?
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML
Today, my mom took my cell to work with her. When she got home later, she scolded me for not answering her calls. When I pointed out that she'd taken it, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, I was taking a selfie. My grandma saw me, then after smirking to herself, she went and told my parents that I was "doing that sexting thing". They believed her and grounded me, even after I showed that all my photos and sent messages were totally innocent. FML
Today, I fell asleep while using my laptop. The next thing I know, it's 8am and my dad is screaming at me for posting "u skank-ass cunt-face" on my mom's Facebook timeline. I never made that post, but he won't believe me. My asshole brother, meanwhile, can't stop smirking at me. FML
Ironic, isn't it?
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
Hank Pecker
Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, my mum took away my laptop and my phone and won't let me call, text, or go out with friends for one month. Why? I left the toilet seat up. I'm writing this from a public library. FML
Today, I was on the toilet, when my Mom thought it would be a fun idea to barge in, take a picture of me, post it on Facebook, and tag me. FML
Top comments
Darkcamzy 10
Troll grandpa strikes again
lilhellian 27
Was wondering when we would see a grandpop.. So many grandma FML's..
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Comments (98)
Adhdkid107 9
Oh grandpa... *slaps knee* You silly man.
NeinKittenz 20
That's what you get for wearing his clothes.
ry24 12
The question is does he look incredible?
HopeisaPanda 12
#13 #36 I love your comments.
RebelYell14 4
Can't stop laughing over the fact that "I" posted that. What a dick!!
happylappy 21
Your Grandpa is hilarious!
rg350dx 29
This is why I don't participate in this Facebook nonsense.
NeinKittenz 20
You don't like people invading your privacy? Wtf Is your problem...
Shrike 24
16- You don't use Facebook because you're afraid you'll leave your computer unlocked and your grandfather will post stuff under your name while you're ********? Great foresight there. Question is: why do you use a computer at all, since people can do other things with it when it's unlocked and unattended?
rg350dx 29
I should go to a therapist immediately. I clearly see your point. Also, I have horrible, conniving family members who enjoy nothing more than to torment one another through any medium possible.
rg350dx 29
Good point #19. However I have devised a plan for my technology paranoia. Every time I use an electronic device I immediately destroy it upon completion of its use. Needless to say, I have quite the electronics bill. I've been through 2 computers soon to be 3 on just this FML alone.
EvilUndead 9
19, social networks are mostly consist of crap, stalkers, marketers, self-obsessed and delusional people, and time wasters. In most cases participating isn't worth the security risk - there are no benefits.
Shrike 24
Could say the same thing for most of the internet, FML included. Oh wait, it's EvilUndead. Couldn't resist a chance to play the contrarian and troll for a debate, as per usual. Forget I acknowledged your existence.
BellaBelle_fml 23
28 - I find it rather humorous that you are using the FML website, which can be classified as a social network, to state your negative opinions of social networks on. The FML site consists of every single one of the things you have listed as being reasons why you think social networks aren't worth the security risks. I know you did say 'most', but I still found it rather amusing.
Michael_92 20
I find it quite funny that most of you people that say security and privacy issues have no idea about CISPA and what that means for the internet.
doodlecloud 27
You can actually get turned down for jobs for not having facebook. They Google your name, don't find an account, figure you must have something to hide and are untrustworthy and maybe worse. It's easier to just get a facebook account. I know loads of people with facebook that don't do the whole posting all the time/facebook games/pictures/liking stupid pages things, they just use it to message friends, organise events, keep up to date with people. It's really not that terrible.
EvilUndead 9
#31, "Could say the same thing for most of the internet". Yes it applies to the rest of the internet as well. Few years ago (7..10), when internet was less popular, there were smart people and you could learn something from them. Now it is mostly stupid teenagers and sea of crap. "Forget I acknowledged" You can't be silent when you have nothing to say, can't you. #33, "Social networks" has "real name" policy. Which isn't present on FML. #60, "You can actually get turned down for jobs for not having facebook." That's american problem. If you run into this problem, try getting a job in organization that actually needs people or start your own business.
doodlecloud 27
70 I'm from England, it happens here too. A lot of companies do that nowadays, including ones that 'actually need people'. Starting your own business is not very wise if you don't have some experience, and possibly contacts, and most people don't have the money to just start one. A lot of people dont even want to own there own business or it doesn't make sense for their career. Imo, it would be a lot easier to just make a Facebook account. I don't even think that companies looking at your Facebook is that bad a thing - it's up to you what you put up and make private so if it affects you badly that's your fault. If my uni looked at people's Facebook before offering places I'd have to work with a lot fewer morons.
chanellgymnast 17
And the trolling grandpa finally emerges!
Justice_Beaver 13
That sucks
Grand_Cookie 21
Haha! Kind of a dick move, but it's pretty funny from the outside looking in. Your mom's totally not going to forget this either, so that sucks.
Brenna19 5
Should've logged out of Facebook
M3DIC4T3 29
Shoulda, coulda, woulda....
Raori 25
How many likes did you get? Your punishment could have been worse!