Today, I am seven months pregnant with my third child. I woke up to my two-and-a-half year old trying to "pop the balloon" in my tummy. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found out I'm pregnant with my second child. This wouldn't be so bad if my son wasn't only 10 months old and my partner, the father of my children, hadn't been secretly seeing his ex wife. FML
Today, my husband jolted in bed and while still half-asleep said, "I had a nightmare; I dreamt we had a kid." I'm 8 months pregnant. FML
Not again
Today, I was concerned I hadn’t restarted my periods yet after the birth of our first child. Turns out it’s because I’m pregnant again already. We must have gotten pregnant off the very first egg I released after giving birth. Our first baby is only 3 months old. FML
Today, I am 9 months pregnant. I had a dream where I successfully pushed and gave birth to my son. Meanwhile, in the real world, I successfully pushed and gave birth to a large dump. FML
Classic grandma
Today, I announced my fourth pregnancy, this time with twins. I heard my mother mutter, “Finally two kids from the same dad.” FML
Today, my husband and I broke the news that I'm pregnant. Our 8-year-old son's reactions so far have been crying inconsolably, trying to punch me in the stomach, and swearing that he won't let me give him a brother or sister. FML
The fertility dance worked
Today, I'm currently 9 months pregnant with my second child within 3 years. I was told by 4 different doctors over the course of the past 5 years that I'm incapable of having kids, due to a medical condition that affects my reproductive system. FML
I'm too old for this stuff (or so I thought)
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I'm 53 and I have four grown children and grandchildren. FML
Today, I found out that my wife is pregnant again. During her last two pregnancies, she craved pop-tarts and screamed bloody murder at the drop of a hat, so I went out and bought a box for her. Turns out that this time, pop-tarts make her want to puke. Cue screaming. FML
Unexpected
Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm expecting our second child. He ripped up the sonogram and yelled at me to "fucking get rid of it" while jabbing me in the chest. FML
Top comments
ChocolateScyther 19
that sounds like something out of a horror movie. make sure you keep knives out of your kid's reach...
Bricktothehead 21
If she's 2 1/2 I think she can be forgiven. Although getting a suit of armor might be a serious consideration until she knows better.
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Comments (60)
AlyssaDiannaa 20
I can understand this, it does look like a balloon
Nickt21 11
Make sure the baby is ok
theamazingman21 8
just make sure your child doesnt get hold of a knife or something...
mzcupcakez 20
Oh my god
Jayy_Dash23 9
yea **** your life for having three kids Woah...
WasabiG 11
The kid is trying to save himself from middle child syndrome xD
canunotplease 1
Uhm she's a child, relax
Gemfez 17
This sounds cute. It would be fml if the kid had a pin.
brightlink 8
With what