Today, I absentmindedly stuck two magnets in my mouth while talking, and accidentally swallowed them. I had to go the emergency room. The nurses at the station laughed at me. They thought it was a joke. They couldn't believe an 18 year old would swallow magnets. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I shat a magnet. FML
Today, my five-year-old told me she had accidentally swallowed a thumbtack. In panic mode we raced to the ER. With no insurance. Only after the tests, examinations and X-rays did she tell me was "just joking." FML
Today, I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning. As the dentist was working on my teeth, he accidentally sprayed water all over my face. I couldn't stop laughing nervously, which made the dentist think I was choking. He ended up calling for backup and I had to explain that I was just laughing. FML
Today, I blanked and forgot to take out my piercing before going for my MRI, even though the nurses asked me multiple times to make sure I had no metal on me before entering, you know, the big machine made of massive electromagnets. The piercing was on my clitoris. FML
Today, I went to the dentist for a routine check-up, and halfway through the appointment, the dentist exclaimed, "Oops!" Turns out, he accidentally glued my lips together while fixing a tiny chip in my front tooth. I spent the next two hours communicating through exaggerated facial expressions and hand gestures. FML
Today, I accidentally punched myself in the mouth while eating a Go-Gurt. I was eating it because I'd just had my wisdom teeth removed. FML
Today, as I was trying to remove my lunch from the hot oven tray, my finger brushed against the metal for a moment, and I instinctively put it in my mouth. I burnt my tongue, on my finger. I didn't realize that was possible. FML
Today, I had a dentist appointment in which a nurse numbed my mouth. After coming home, I took a nap in which I unknowing bit through my top lip. I physically can't speak. FML
Today, I went to the orthodontist to have my braces worked on. I accidentally swallowed some of the cleaning solution she used. She told me it would probably give me an upset stomach. Apparently, an upset stomach and crapping your pants means the same thing to an orthodontist. FML
Today, my little brother put a battery to my tongue while I was sleeping with my mouth open. The shock found its way right to my metal filling. FML
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Top comments
luxor21221 0
You "absent mindedly" put magnets in your mouth........ And then you "accidently" swallowed them....... How do you figure???????????
ScottyD620 0
what's wrong with swallowing magnets? you can walk up to a girl wearing a bunch of jewelry (well maybe really really cheap jewelry thats magnetic) and be like.. "I think there's a connection.. I'm magnetically attracted to you"
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Comments (148)
warpedtourgurl 0
oh wow.....not very bright are ya? haha i did the same thing in 7th grade, but instead i was chewing on a baby safey pin and swallowed it. hopefully it came out a few days later.....
shacala 0
why were magnets anywhere near your mouth??
rinaldy 0
I can't believe an 18 yr old would swallow magnets either...
surt 0
how?
Quinnjamin 0
I agree with the nurses :P
Saralaise 3
So...how do you absentmindedly put magnents in your mouth? I get absentmindedly trying to stick the milk pitcher to the fridge door and putting the magnets in the fridge...but in your MOUTH? And there is no way you accidentally swallow magnents. If you know they are in your mouth, DON'T SWALLOW THEM.
scateice 0
that must've been uncomfortable
shazady 0
OP - don't let these idiots get to you. Loads of people stick stuff in their mouths randomly. More common is a pencil or a pen than a magnet, but I understand you. I'm glad you went to the ER because magnets can really mess things up in your body!
jshen 0
Hahaha, #9. ....And how big were the magnets for you to swallow BOTH of them?
jmaczor 0
I bet magnets aren't the only thing you've "absent mindedly" put in your mouth and "accidently" swallowed