Today, for my birthday, my brother gave me some of those fake 'Harry Potter' edible cockroaches. I ate one. It wasn't fake. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while eating a sandwich, I saw a worm. Knowing that my friend always tries to scare me with fake worms and insects, I bit it to show her I knew it was fake. It was real. FML
Today, while babysitting my nephew, I was looking through a bin of toys, and I saw a fake spider. I picked it up to do a prank with. It wasn't fake. FML
Today, my girlfriend surprised me with what was allegedly a birthday "cake". It was so horribly deformed, I wasn't sure whether to eat it or wear it as a hat. I had to pretend it didn't taste like play-doh, and ended up throwing it up in the toilet. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, I was celebrating my birthday when my friend gave me chocolate as a gift. I wasn't suspecting anything and ate about half of it before I noticed something strange. It turned out there were some kind of worms living in it and the chocolate was about a year after the expiration date. I got sick. FML
Today, my 28-year-old brother who has been pranking me all my life, put a chocolate cupcake on my chair. I sat on it, with my white dress. On my wedding day. FML
Today, I was feeling down and decided to eat one of my roommate's chocolate Pop-Tarts to cheer myself up. I took a big bite and thought it tasted "off". It was full of live maggots. FML
Today, I woke up to an unexpected surprise for my birthday. It wasn't cake, nor ice cream. It was hundreds of baby spiders crawling all over me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML
Today, I was having a cheat meal after two weeks of strict dieting. When I opened the pizza box, I saw a cockroach. It had been baked into the cheese. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My only birthday present was a cake that my dad bought from Walmart. Well, it sure looked tasty. The only problem: it had nuts on it. Guess what I'm highly allergic too? At least my dad told me he'd "tell me how it tastes." FML
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Top comments
JGunit 0
how do you not know its real?
ronton 4
there are no Harry potter edible cockroaches. that's chocolate frogs
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Comments (135)
chyeah 0
ew
NGM_KID 0
How can you not tell the difference between a fake and a real cockroach!?
xxiheartyouxx 0
um, how old are you?
bipolarchipmunk 0
did you die?
winterharte 0
Greatest question ever. Shortly followed by "Hey check if he dropped any good loot" :D
christoper 0
WTFWTFWTF
itsgen 16
hahah you ate a real cockroach on ur birthday!! uggh what an ass!! i say for his b-day you bake a pie, and inside the pie you add dog crap :] that bitch deserves it! after what he did to you
xXBlackAceXx 0
wow.......... i didnt a girl could be so.......evil?........thats hot lol
lyssalicious 0
To the people saying YDI: Yeah, i agree the OP should know a real cockroach from a fake. But, then again, not all people have to go around worrying that someone is gonna set them up to eat real bugs, hence the OP's first thought not being, "Oh shit, this is real!" but instead thinking it was just a good fake. Anyway, that sucks, but at least you got some nutrition!
redbluegreen 41
#18 - You said my words exactly. Not everybody expects to be given bugs for their birthday. Plus, Harry Potter's coming back into style again with the next movie and all. I wouldn't be too shocked if there's more Harry Potter themed FML soon. The jelly bean pranks were awful enough.
Go_Home 0
I'd get a spider and throw it on his face. How rude of him. Oh, and Happy Birthday :)
eagle20 0
first happy birthday. second next time make sure its not real im pretty sure my 3 year old brother could tell the diffrence lol