Today, during a firework show, my dog gave me her opinion about them by practically eating half my bedroom door then defecating on my bed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that the 2 loud "firework booms" I heard were actually a guy shooting his dog on the unfinished road behind my house. FML
Today, I put out a fire. Sadly, it was on my doorstep because someone had lit a bag of dog poop. FML
Today, I was laying with my cat when someone set off a firework next to my window. Now I have stitches and a bed covered in blood. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dog scratching at my door. After a while of this, I finally got up to let her in. When I opened the door, she looked at me, threw up, and scurried away. FML
Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML
Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML
Today, I came home to find my dog had learned how to open our fridge. He ate the birthday cake I was saving for a friend's surprise party, and to add insult to injury, he'd also apparently thrown the barely digested cake up all over my bed. FML
Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML
Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML
Today, instead of waking up to soft sunlight creeping in the window or the gentle trill of birds, I was awakened by the sound of my dog vomiting all over my bed. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
stardustjunkie 12
You should play classical music when fireworks are going off, it's supposed to calm animals down. Works with our cat! We put his bed in a room with classical music playing and he'll sleep straight through the fireworks instead of being sick with stress. I know it sounds crazy..
badluckdawson 19
How does someone deserve this?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (63)
feldco1 17
Luckily this isn't a common event. Usually before the 4th there's tons of tips for keeping your dog as comfortable as possible on that day. Try to find something so you can enjoy next years 4th.
perdix 31
Yeah, when they play "Stars & Stripes Forever" twice in a twenty-minute show, I'd say that show was "shitty," although I wouldn't express it literally (unless I could find an unoccupied urinal.) PS: Although it's become part of the Fourth of July soundtrack, the "1812 Overture" is about a battle between France and Russia, and has nothing to do with us.
jabi3jabi3 8
Who says defecating lool. I'm so using that now.
vanaathiel 13
"So using that now"? That's what it's called, ever go to school?
brackaman 18
Who says lool?
laden_swallow09 35
Search "Thundershirt". You're welcome.
KiddoKS 19
I heard a lot of success stories with those, but unfortunately it didn't help with my dog. I will say the manufacturer offers a money back guarantee, so there's nothing to lose in trying it!
mikailanicole98 11
Dogs do that... You gotta love em though.
SilencioIsTheKey 12
That sucks. You should put the dog in a secure place next time. Like a basement or small bathroom. I've never had animals that reacted toward fireworks or anything of the sort. My Aunt has an English bulldog who cowers over any loud noise. That's basically the only thing I've seen related to this.
olpally 33
Bitches be crazy... Literally. Good luck cleaning up! Lol.
tgbvfr 8
Ydi! Asshole, no fireworks near animals, it scares them!!
Ziggy122 15
Hey, it's not like the dog knows it's pissing you off! Dogs' hearing is way more sensitive than humans', so stuff like fireworks stresses them out big time.
BerylliumSphere 3
So? Your dog's FML would be "Last night there were thousands of explosions and gun shots, I tried to chew through my human's door so we could all escape but failed. In my ultimate fear of my family's demise I shit myself on the bed....fml"