Today, before my date came to pick me up, I put tissues under my arms so I wouldn't leave wet marks. I forgot to remove them, and when we got physical, they fell out, looking like I'd stuffed my bra. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had a performance. I have to go bra-less to wear my gown and I didn't want any peek-a-boos. I asked my boyfriend to bring "large band-aids" without telling him why I needed them. He brought waterproof, top-notch tough ones. They're still stuck to me, and are not coming off anytime soon. FML
Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML
Today, I rushed out of the bathroom with toothpaste smeared all over my chin and cheek. I was so anxious about going on a date that I didn’t realize this until said date pointed it out halfway through dinner. FML
Today, I was on a date, and I went to put my arm around her, trying to be romantic, but my coordination went straight to hell. Instead of her shoulder, I ended up accidentally grabbing her tit. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. He was so nervous, he broke down in tears after failing to unclasp my bra after multiple fumbling attempts. Mood? Ruined. FML
Today, I had sex with my fiancée. My panties fell behind the bed. Later, when I went to get them, I found three other pairs. Only one pair was mine. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my amazing boyfriend. As we were getting dressed, I realized I had lost my bra. After intense searching I finally found it and put it on. It wasn't mine. FML
Today, while out at dinner with my boyfriend, I accidentally ripped out my tampon picking a wedgie. FML
Today, while brushing my teeth before a date, I sneezed so hard that toothpaste flew all over my clean shirt. I was already running late, so I panicked and tried to wipe it off with water. It left huge wet spots. I showed up looking like I had just lost a fight with a giant toothbrush. FML
Today, while I was at work, I didn't have any panty liners so I used tissue. I was taking orders when I suddenly felt the tissue trailing down my leg. I tried not to move, but it inevitably fell through my pants onto the floor in front of my co-workers. I swiftly put it into my pocket. Luckily, it had nothing on it. FML
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Top comments
awuh_man 0
that's not cool. to any of the posters above me. I see where she's coming from, I have over active sweat glands, and when I get nervous, I sweat a lot. it sucks having to pick clothes based on how much sweat will show. and I've tried everything, prescription deodorant, sweat pads, so don't be so rude and inconsiderate.
babybubz 0
#18.. she probably DOES wear deodorant/antiperspirant as well.. but she might still sweat through that. SO.. she puts tissue under her pits to soak up any sweat she produces before she goes out... so she's not already sweaty when she leaves. just because she does that with the tissue doesn't mean she doesn't wear any deodorant you know.. geeeeeez.
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Comments (121)
xcanox 9
YDI for getting physicall. I hate sex. :P
Ellodie_fml 0
never heard of deodorant?
kidclarke 15
YDI for being a ****
111ty111 0
use deodorant
theLuscious 2
put on some ******* deodorant retard
LullzKitteh 1
ydi for being flat enough to be accused of stuffing! (just call me tigbitties)
babyguns143 5
Seriously?! You went an entire date without remembering or realizing you still had shit paper under your arms? I. Doubt. That.
GAeroNKissR 26
I'd let him believe it was stuffing before ever admitting what it's true purpose was...