Today, at soccer tryouts, the coach made us run the entire practice. I ran the whole two hours ahead of everyone. When the tryout ended, I vomited due to dehydration. I didn't make the team. The coach's reasoning: "Only the weak throw up". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sick and had soccer trials on the same day. At the soccer trials, the coach called me over and told me I was doing really good and to keep it up. I said thanks and vomited on him. FML
Today, at soccer, I repeatedly asked my coach for water as I was feeling light headed. His response every time was, "Five more minutes". Eventually, I got so dehydrated that I passed out. The first thing my coach said when I woke up was, "Why didn't you get some water?" FML
Today, my swim coach had me swim a 400 meter freestyle. Feeling a little sick near the end, I lifted my head to breathe, then burped, and threw up violently all in the pool. All my team mates screamed horrified running out of the pool, and now they have to drain it. I was told not to come back. FML
Today, I had my first day of soccer tryouts. We began with a two mile run. Trying to be honest for once, I didn't lie about my time. Everyone else did. I thus got the worst score, and had to run it again. FML
Today, I ran a mile for my gym class. While I managed to cut two minutes off my time, a few minutes later I felt dizzy and nauseous, which I thought was because I pushed myself too hard. I collapsed and vomited in front of everyone. Not a single person moved to help me. Not even the teacher. FML
Today, I was wrestling in a tournament. I was in the finals about to win when the kid threw up on me. They thought I'd hit him in the stomach hard enough to make him throw up, so they disqualified me. FML
Today, I made my school's soccer team. I told the coach that since I have diabetes, I might need to sit out occasionally. He promptly erased my name and said he didn't accept "slackers." FML
Today, I got a stomach bug. Then my three kids joined in like it was a team sport. My husband decided his actual soccer game was more important. FML
Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML
Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML
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Top comments
The_9th_Doctor 18
what a jerk. keep trying
Wizardo 34
That's such horseshit, appeal to one of the other coaches since there are normally more than one. That actually shows you have the best fitness there, yes I am a fellow football player, carry on.
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Comments (137)
The_9th_Doctor 18
what a jerk. keep trying
Caitie_kid 8
He should hurl his throw up at the coach
_parth 20
My coach was a jerk too.
TheCanucklehead 22
Tell him he looks like throw up
Snazzy_Snaz 17
Or join another soccer team and beat your coach's team. then laugh at his face
DaniPandi 22
Not relevant, but #1--or should I say 9?--who did you murder for your username?
The_9th_Doctor 18
I didn't murder anyone. The hell are you talking about.
sweet23_fml 11
i think #38 was referring to doctor who.
rockaroths 15
Screw that coach, join cross country, they would probably love to have you.
tiernang 21
no, 38 was talking about how many people probably wanted his name.
Shy_Anne 10
Show off
ColdplaySucks 18
David Tennant was overrated.
Wizzlbang 10
#32 Tell him he's stinky, and a meanie too! That'll show him!
Trisha_aus 15
David Tennant was amazing! #67
ottokat 15
I think I sense an overriding aura of pessimism coming from #67, or should I say user "ColdplaySucks".
TheBrochure 22
#49 (you'll probably never see this) - While you are correct and I commend the informational altruism, comment #41 was a brilliant Whovian joke of its own!
Wizardo 34
That's such horseshit, appeal to one of the other coaches since there are normally more than one. That actually shows you have the best fitness there, yes I am a fellow football player, carry on.
Damian95 16
If you throw up that usually shows how hard you work. My school wins state and excels in every sport and ee appreciate someone who pushes her/himself to the point of throwing up.
snowby2 15
Making it on a team at my school is like a popularity contest. total bs
guy24 9
When that happens to me, I just hold it in. It is very hard to do, but it can be done. It is not like a illness where you literally have no choice. Just throwing that out there. I never have thrown up due to exercise.
SammyS2012 21
my coach would actually get mad at me if i threw up. yes it shows youre working hard, but pushing youraelf to the point of throwing up is dangerous and not healthy. if done repeatedly, it can cause many problems due to the acidity of your stomach acid and bile (like causing damage to your esophagus and mouth).
SammyS2012 21
definitely doesnt make your weak though
SammyS2012 21
you* -.-
hawkislayer 2
Op obviously tried to their fullest extent... Obviously if you havnt puked you have never pushed yourself to the maximum.
hutch66 13
I throw up when ever I work too hard. I don't know what it is but my whole life, even though I'm in good shape, I puke after a difficult workout. I can feel it coming and I can hold it in till after but then it just comes out. Pretty disgusting I know but it just happens.
SammyS2012 21
95- do you drink while working out? if so, how much? chugging water down during a work out can actually be bad and cause you to throw up. you need to take small sips every once in a while. or maybe your electrolyte levels go down. when i exercise, i can only take gatorade or powerade because water doesnt have electrolytes, and i would throw up or pass out
hutch66 13
Yeah I drink before and during the workout but its not like I chug water. I don't drink Gatorade just because the salt content but I don't think the reason I puke is dehydration.
SammyS2012 21
thats really weird. if you havent, you should get that checked out, just to make sure everything is okay. i also have a really low iron and hemoglobin level and it causes me to get nauseous after being active. throwing up repeatedly is really detrimental to your health and you should find the reason before something bad happens to you :/ good luck with everything :)
hutch66 13
I'm not a very healthy guy and I've gotten sick of going to the doctor for shit like this cause they can't figure out dick all. I've had just about every test known to man (blood, CT, MRI) done and they can't find anything so I don't know.
bettyboop428 24
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
It's probably a blessing in disguise OP. You shouldn't sacrifice your health that way.
ryanthecheeseguy 18
Athletes will do almost anything to make a team. Op tried his hardest, and his coach was an asshole. This wasn't Op's fault at all.
hcollins1 18
So OP shouldn't have tried his best during try outs? Seems to me he tried his best, and then some causing him to throw up.
little_excel 5
You haven't listened to the song "remember the name" have you?
loganberrybat 11
I beg to differ. It was his fault, vomiting due to dehydration can be avoided by.... Taking a bottle of water with you
siggy_mcsigx 22
Stay hydrated. Drink water the entire day before the intense workout, then drink it sparingly when you are exercising; too much during the time can cause cramps and stomach tenderness. Also eat plenty of healthy food at lunch then eat a sugary granola bar or something similar right before you run. Anyway, that coach sounds awful. At least you made it through the two hours before you puked!
bettyboop428 24
104 & 110: I agree and that is all I meant by my comment. If OP wasn't properly prepared for the tryout, who knows if (s)he would do the same thing again during the season. An athlete does not have to make themselves sick to do their best. Dehydration can be a serious issue.
Darkblade21 20
Jesus guys, get your shit together. Vomiting can be caused from over exercising no matter how hydrated you are. OP tried there hardest during the practice and the coach was a dick. Also, vomiting from over exercising isn't potentially dangerous for your health, just a sign that you should take a break.
GrantEvans 14
the coach shouldnt do that. if he noticed you running well wouldnt he have said something? was he to focused on his phone?
DWordHead16 19
I know right? That coach is a douche. He should have given the OP support and advice to fix the issue, or at least just not be an asshole. I wonder why he decided to be a coach in the first place.
lhazz11 23
Seems like it's time for a switch. I loved soccer but the coach was a complete moron so I switched to XC, you seems like you would be good at that OP.
ariiewilliams 17
Damn technology... always a distraction in situations like this!
DocBastard 40
Do you really want to play for such an asshole? Count your blessings that he cut you. If that's the way he thinks, imagine his reaction if you miss a penalty kick.
ariiewilliams 17
Coaches I know have been known to choose favorites during try-outs and go by appearance. Looks like OP wasn't one.
michelleJ11 25
Honestly OP, if the coach is that terrible & that much of an idiot, it's not worth playing for him. I bet you can find a much better team to play for.
floozle702 7
Man, if only you threw up in his general direction...
Welshite 40
But only if his mother was a hamster and his father smelled of elderberries.
CharresBarkrey 16
It physically hurts me that no one is getting 9's reference.
O_O_ok_then 3
I believe the original line was "i fart in your general direction!" You son of a silly person!
NoNamesFree 8
Okay that seriously reminded me of the French guy in monte python... "I fart in your general direction" or "I blow my nostrils at your general direction"
trbuson 11
Weak leaders make weak followers. Go find yourself a good coach who actually cares for their team OP.
NatalieF 5
that sucks , but if you can run two hours you can make any team ! cheer up OP
BadApple88 29
shouldve threw up on him
NatalieF 5
*thrown* sorry i just had to
MrSassypants 34
I* and you forget a period. Sorry, I just had to.
scooterdude720 19
"I* and you forgot a period" is not a complete sentence and you forgot the comma after "I*". Sorry, i just had to.
TheBrochure 22
#88 - Well, if you are going to do that, then at least capitalize the "I" in "Sorry, I just had to."