Today, as if having to endure the noises of my parents having sex in the next room wasn't painful enough, my mom decided to shout, "Yeah! Like a horse!" I want to cry. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML
Today, I can hear my parents having sex in the next room. FML
Today, I found out that my mom screams like a dying monkey while having sex. Even with my music turned up all the way, I can still hear her through our paper thin walls. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, I heard my parents having sex for the first time so I turned the TV up really loud to drown out the noise, and a minute or two later my mom comes downstairs in this skimpy nightgown to ask me why the TV was so loud and, seeing the horror on my face, kept asking what was wrong with me. FML
Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house and I heard a strange sound. I laughed and said, "It sounds like a dog throwing up!" He listened for a second and said, "That's my mom crying downstairs." FML
Today, I finally told my parents I would be changing bedrooms because I could no longer stand hearing them having sex, which is awkward and disturbing. Later, my dad came and asked me quietly if I thought my mom sounded "satisfied." FML
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Today, I muted the TV just in time to hear my mom yell at my dad about how their sex life is "non-existent". FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
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Top comments
StefanKa 23
Well, if your dad us hung like a horse she's a lucky woman. Be happy for them and next time put on headphones ;)
junkman6 22
Well they say what's in the jeans is passed down in the genes. I'd say having a horse **** isn't such a bad thing OP.
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Comments (116)
razi1 20
How old are you to be a disturbed "man" living with your parents?
calucalay 13
I think id be a disturbed woMAN if i heard my parents having sex.
ZY1431 24
headphones work best in situations like this
jmcr 27
I feel your pain, my parents bedroom is right under mine and sometimes in the middle of the night i can hear my dad when they are having sex...i can never fall back asleep after that....
lalablabla100 6
I have the same situation!
perdix 31
Maybe they're talking about how much you eat? Even if it's what we're really thinking, it's not as bad as hearing "Is it in?"
bugfroggy 16
Or maybe she can join in.
Colonelul 2
Hahahhhh. Poor guy. Gonna be OK after a while lill nigga
paigexox0 37
Theres just some things you cannot un-hear...
epodax 12
Sex is a natural thing, I don't get why you are so freaked out by it. let your parents have some fun
dragon5assassin 5
Why we're you trying to listen to them should be the actual question lol. Sorry OP but find something to get that noise out next time lol
sickerthanyou 13
why is it painful to hear your parents having sex?, I'd understand uncomfortable or awkward but painful?
orangeguy04 7
If youre really that daft to not understand the concept of an imagery word to help the reader understand the feelings of the OP, then you shouldnt be here. However, if you want some sort of relation to wrap your head around, here you go: pain makes you cringe, hearing youre parents having sex makes you cringe; therefore by correlation, hearing your parents having sex is painful. Happy?