Today, after working the midnight shift at my job, I thought it would be nice to leave a sweet love note along with my boyfriend's favourite candy in his car. Upon finding it, he immediately broke up with me for "breaking into" his car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML
Post-it
Today, my boyfriend told me to stay home, because he wanted to come by to give me a birthday surprise. Later on, he came by, posted a note, rung the bell and left. The note was a break up note. FML
Snuggle
Today, I wanted to surprise my partner by leaving a love letter on his car's windshield while he was at work. He texted me later saying, “You know you left that on my coworker’s car, right?” Now some stranger thinks I want to “snuggle forever.” FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be a good idea to break up with me in his car. I had to walk home. FML
You got mail
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. When we took a break and went downstairs, he checked the mail. He had received a letter from his ex-girlfriend, which he opened in front of me. He then began sobbing on my shoulder and broke up with me. He still had to drive me home. FML
Carrier pigeon
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be cute to leave a love letter in my car while I was at work. She left my lights on. I got a dead battery. FML
My dear neighbor
Today, I had a very sweet and romantic love note brutally scratched into the door of my brand new car. It was addressed to Cindy. Cindy lives next door. FML
Today, I walked out to my car to see a broken window, a bunch of stuff missing, egg shells, and a note that read, "Stop banging my boyfriend." I haven't had anyone in my love life for over a year. FML
Today, my boyfriend came to my work, at a drive thru, in my car, and then got mad at me because I wouldn't give him free food. In his anger, he put my car in reverse and backed out of line very quickly, only to smash into a paying customer. FML
Top comments
nothing92x 13
"You broke into my car, I break your heart!"
Seany_93 18
That is nice, What a **** head, you deserve better!
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Comments (100)
Seany_93 18
That is nice, What a **** head, you deserve better!
Alleged_Cranium 7
A stalker/creeper does not deserve better.
rocketiquette 20
How is she a stalker? Did you miss the "girlfriend" part? Guess he didn't want you to see the other girls panties that she left.... Anyone that finds a sweet, considerate gesture an insult or flips shit over it needs to be left out in the rain. What is it with these people?!
MoeT8979 8
So I guess you're sayin that "gf" means she can invade his space?
DocBastard 40
Invade his space?? She didn't storm his castle, she just left his favourite candy in his car.
DocBastard 40
Well that's awkward... The comment to which I had replied had vanished.
Cairo_Sanchez 8
He was looking for any excuse to get outta the relationship, you're better off.
SirCharles83 13
I'm curious; how do you know OP deserves better?
rockstar362 8
I think it depends how long they've been going out for. If it was a brand new relationship, I could see how the guy would be a little worried. Then again my ex was a stalker so I suppose I have a bias
SirCharles83 13
OP could be a scumbag cheating *****. In which case, she deserves worse.
alycion 39
Maybe he has slight paranoia issues or just doesn't like people messing with his stuff. Maybe last time he found something in his car it was from the aliens.
Seany_93 18
#72 any guy who acts like that a chick no matter what shes like deserves better. Unless shes done it 3 times before and he said not to or they fight way to much
SirCharles83 13
87- op could be a cheater or a scum bag. For all we know, this is exactly what op deserves.
nothing92x 13
"You broke into my car, I break your heart!"
ICastillo 25
Hmm the classic break for a break situation.
Sir_ND_Pity 35
Give me a break of that KitKat bar?
Codezlol 21
Blood sport guys... That was an easy one!
melacortez 11
O hell no that's hella wrong you deserve better
TheChiver 7
Hella....I haven't heard that "word" in such a long time.
Palirose 22
It's just slang, I'm from northern California and I use the term often. Every part of the US has their own slang when speaking. I don't get why some people are hating on hella. (Note that recently I've been seeing many complain about it.)
jojimugo 20
Deserved it . Really? A romantic gesture from your girlfriend, common man
longchow 8
She totally deserves it! Now she can find a winner instead of a paranoid loser. She deserves a guy that will appreciate her kind gesture, and now she has a chance to find one :)
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
What a creative reason for breaking up with you. At least it wasn't the typical "I'm gay" or "I'm not ready for a relationship" speech.
Charmillionaire 13
Or typical FML fashion, "I'm breaking up with you for an utterly ridiculous reason, and with a large expense to your feelings."
FastidiousPear 6
Is nobody else wondering how op broke in? I'd like to learn that kind if thing.
nunu76 4
ouch i got the 'im not ready for a relationship' speech
emeraldisle 30
Seems to me he was just looking for any reason to break it off. No matter how stupid it is.
13ky13 20
5, that seems to be the standard comment for every breakup on FML.
emeraldisle 30
True but this seems to be an especially stupid reason.
DocBastard 40
Your love was as vast as the Milky Way, but it's no big loss. You may be thinking you have Butterfingers for losing him, but you should be the one who Snickers since you're rid of that...that Whatchamacallit...right, that dick. You can have Mounds more fun without him.
Werken247 14
I'm suddenly craving a candy bar and can't figure out why.
ManInTheMachine 20
They do say men are from Mars, but something tells me he was dropped on his head and Crunch(ed) it as a child.
PenguinBitch 44
Wow. What a way to break up with OP. He has to learn how to be a gentlemen and be more like the 3 Musketeers.
gc327072 31
I'd be so mad I'd put a Bounty on him.
Seayah 4
It's going to cost him at least 100 Grand in child support with Baby Ruth on the way.
poccocurantes 7
Almond joyin this.
Thursday737 7
These puns are getting to me. I think I'm gonna go Take 5.
SPRKY 6
"Time for a break" OP!
Werken247 14
He's just pissy that you've got awesome carjacking skills and he doesn't. Or you're a phsycho stalker girlfriend...
RedPillSucks 33
That's the thing.... She (?) most likely had a key, or he left the car unlocked, so it wouldn't have been "breaking in". OPs boyfriend is a turd.
Maddy9111 11
seriously??? thats just wrong, its not like you broke in to steal anything... you meant well
PenguinBitch 44
Make sure he doesn't eat the candy. It'll surely help you when your depressed.
dabum18 5
What an ingrateful person he is
ElricMustang 23
Ungrateful*
RedPillSucks 33
in·grate·ful (ngrtful) n. An ungrateful person who has eaten candy they didn't deserve. [From Middle English ingrat, ungrateful, from Old French, from Latin ingrtus : in-, not; see in-1 + grtus, pleasing, thankful; see gwer-2 in Indo-European roots.]