Today, after I bathed my nine month old, I laid her on my bed to grab a diaper. I turned around to see that she'd peed on my comforter. I then put her in her playpen to put my cover in the wash. I came back into the room to get her, and saw she'd taken off her diaper. She'd crapped in her playpen. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I washed the comforter one of my nine-month-old kittens peed on last night. Just as soon as my boyfriend put it on the bed, she peed on it again. FML
Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML
Today, I took a shower while my two-year-old slept. In the 30 minutes it took me to shower, get dressed, and go back to his room, he had woken up, taken his pants and diaper off, and smears crap all over himself and his bed. FML
Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML
Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML
Today, my 2-year-old woke up from her nap with a full diaper, then decided to climb down from her bed and got stuck under the railing, leaving a stinky trail of poop everywhere. FML
Today, my one year-old took his diaper off and peed on my chest while I was sleeping. FML
Today, I gave my 8-month-old a bath in the kitchen sink after dinner, like I always do. Today, she decided to poop in it. FML
Today, I was taking a nap with my 5 month-old on the (carpeted) floor in the living room. When I woke up, my daughter had bombed her diaper, and her and the dogs were rolling in it on the carpet and tiled kitchen. FML
Today, I went to change my one year-old son's diaper and it was a total disaster! He'd picked at his diaper and it came loose. There was poop all over his sleeper, and when I went to clean it up, he put his hands in it. Let's just say I threw the damn sleeper away. FML
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Top comments
UpYourself 0
Haha kids...
Krystakitty 0
Its just what Kids do...as a mom you sjhould know to put a towel under her if shes on your bed and if shes prone to taking of her nappy she should have had trousers or a vest with the buttons done up at the bottom common sense really
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Comments (129)
jchansfan 0
Someone's going to the orphanage...
nokillnobeepbeep 0
What!? Are you insulting the orphanage? Don't make me grab my dancing shoes and bring it! Hell, you know what, it has already been broughten! "It's the hard-knock life for us! It's the hard-knock life for us! 'Steada treated, We get tricked! 'Steada kisses, We get kicked! It's the hard-knock life! Got no folks to speak of, so, It's the hard-knock row we how! ..."
blastvortex 4
Haha. Ah, the war stories of child care. These kind of things are rather bound to happen. Of course, you're the one who made the kid, so your only real options are to get exasperated at your self-inflicted woes or just bite the bullet and laugh it off. Picking the latter is a little less stress-inducing.
wellinever 5
You've been a Mum for nine months. Surely you are not surprised? It's just part and parcel of being a parent and it won't last. Every month something changes. Soon she'll be crawling, walking, talking. Treasure it all. So it can be a bit messy now and then. Parenting babies, toddlers and small children is a delight. It's child's play. But nothing prepares you for your children becoming teenagers.
dieburnbot 0
Sounds like the story of my life. :)
caticaticati 3
Um... like a changing pad. Which is covered in a plastic sort of material. So it doesn't soak through and can be easily washed.
quantum_insanity 0
And she'll be walking soon. Just think where she can crap then! :p
Mx_Rider 6
its mother hood u dumbass gosh dam really your COMPLAINING and coming here..... sorry to say this i dont wanna be an asshole but... YDI in the 1st place for opening ur legs dont complain clean the shit up and move on.
ricanmami_417 0
ur so ****** rude. get the hell off FML if u dont like peoples comments.
newlove_fml 0
#21: Please. Do us all a favor. Don't ever reproduce. The world doesn't want any more of you. Have you ever heard of a little something called rape? Yeah. It happens. It can still impregnate a woman. I'm a rape baby. I'm not saying this woman was raped, but she doesn't deserve some form of punishment because she had sex. That may not be what you meant but that was how you sounded. The baby just crapped on the floor and peed on the bed. Babies do that. It was a funny story. OP shared that story with us. That's not complaining. Enough with your ignorance. By the way, it's YOU, not U. Also, YOUR, not UR. And one more thing, motherhood is one word. Have a nice day.
Flutist 3
Crap, I'd be pissed off at the little shit.
vev_fml 0
lmfao. ydi for not knowing parenthood entails cleaning up shit.
grimmelok 0
Coulda been worse. Apparently when I a baby and my brothers were left to take care of me, I walked around the house and pooped all over the hallway and living room carpet. One my brother's even stepped in it.