Today, after a long discussion, my dad still doesn't understand how evolution works, and thinks it's a myth that was debunked a long time ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML
Today, my dad tried to convert me, as he has numerous times before, and asked me why I was an atheist. After giving him a polite explanation and asking him if we could drop the subject, he nodded slowly and said, "You must be menstruating or something. You'll change your mind." FML
Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML
Today, my dad refused to believe that the Animal Planet's mermaid mockumentaries were faked. Instead he got into a huge argument with me, claiming the government is covering up the existence of mermaids and must've threatened the producers to keep it quiet. FML
Today, my dad bought a Bible. He's completely illiterate and is basing his religious beliefs off people on TV saying "It's in the Bible." I miss bacon and am tired of explaining to people that he's an idiot. FML
Today, I told a friend I had become more religious lately. He immediately started mocking me for being a "stupid creationist bigot." When I told him how offensive that was, he acted bewildered and started condescendingly lecturing me about how "science has proven God does not exist." FML
Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML
Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML
Today, I spotted my dad watching a wildlife/nature video. I pointed out to him that the animal on the screen was critically endangered; he rebutted by telling me that it's impossible for the animal on the screen to go extinct because people keep hunting it. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that it's biologically impossible for cats and dogs to cross-breed, and that his "brilliant idea" of getting ours to mate is just plain disturbing. He still doesn't believe me. FML
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Top comments
iAmScrubs 19
Did you explain the theory of a Pikachu evolving into a Raichu? That might help clear some things up.
SunnyUserName123 5
If he's a really hairy 300 pound fatty, get a picture of an ape and compare
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Comments (71)
catnip1997 0
So I'm guessing he hasn't seen pokemon
ramboman19 8
Please don't suspend me for saying this, but how is your dad not believing in evolution an FML? His dad having different beliefs absolutely ruined OP's day?
hatepineapple 14
Good point. This isn't really much of an "FML", save for the possible embarrassment that the OP may be feeling, or the fact that he wasted time arguing. Even so, it's not really that bad...
khaya 9
Evolution is just a fancy word for growing up.
Sirin_fml 47
Hi guys, I'm closing the comments on this one. The bigotry from all sides is annoying the holy shit (hahahaha!) out of Alan and me, and frankly, cleaning up after the idiotic pharisaical commenters is a bit boring by this point. Move out of our basement, get a job, air your dirty laundry in your own yard, yadda yadda yadda. You can do it, son.
Wolli 2
I don't believe in the theory of evolution (except in pokemon, then it's fact), or creation (even though i was raised as a christian). both sound like... stupid ideas. monkeys turning into men, and women being made from mens rib bones....? yeshss..
jonnyblackless 6
It iz myth .. U cant get a cell to transform .. If evolution is real then GIVE ME WINGS BITCH