Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my six-year-old son told me how it was funny that there's "a food chicken and an animal chicken". That's going to be a fun one to explain to him. FML
Today, after a long discussion, my dad still doesn't understand how evolution works, and thinks it's a myth that was debunked a long time ago. FML
Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me, "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML
Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML
Today, my 5 year old son asked me to explain how he was born. After I told him I had a C-Section, he went to school and told everyone he was born at sea. I found out when the teacher called me. FML
Today, I got into a heated argument with my mom, because apparently I'm an idiot for not sharing her belief that chickens are mammals. She has a university degree in this stuff. FML
Today, I got a call from my 8-year-old's 3rd grade teacher. Apparently a question went around class asking, "Why do you think you were put on this Earth?", and my son answered, "My dad says it's because I swam the fastest." FML
Today, my 4 year-old daughter thought it was funny that the chicken on her plate and chickens on farms are called the same name. I had my mouth full so I couldn’t stop my rotten eldest son from saying, “That’s because chicken is dead chickens.” Cue her crying while my son cackled like a sociopath. FML
Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML
Today, I asked my 13-year-old son if he thought he was mature enough for a talk about "the birds and the bees." His response was, "They fly, so what? Why would I care?" FML
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Top comments
Paradoxxxx 16
Hey, at least you raised a smart kid :)
ao9s7yashdun 7
I would be proud.
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Comments (64)
Paradoxxxx 16
Hey, at least you raised a smart kid :)
Polynomial 28
In this case, Paradoxxxx came first.
zandalee 20
I agree. Sounds like a very smart kid.
blinked_281 29
I see what you did there polynomial
iamchron 4
I feel bad for paradoxxxx wife :(
ao9s7yashdun 7
I would be proud.
Schizomaniac 24
Wow, so I came from a monkey? If evolution is true how come there are still monkeys then? And how come a banana fits perfectly into the human hand? Wow.
gracehi 33
I was going to give you a scathing reply, 26, but then a read your profile. Nice try there, buddy. Nice try.
SaintJupiter 16
Either you raised your child very right, or very wrong. I am unsure.
warsun 27
Very very very right
kthsdm 12
Gotta throw the creationist theory out of the window now. We have a mini Sheldon in the making!
1947Chevy 17
O god NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Likian5 26
You've got yourself a genius for a kid, OP. Just be thankful he didn't instead ask you something stupid like what an egg was.
d4m4s74 12
In the case of this question, "what is an egg" or "what do you mean with egg" or the way I usually say it, “define 'egg'" is a good question because it affects the answer. If by egg you mean any egg, the egg is first because dinosaurs and fish lay eggs too. If by egg you mean an egg that came out of a chicken, the chicken must have been first, and finally if by egg you mean an egg a chicken came out off the correct answer is the egg.
AnOriginalName 19
Sounds like someone was watching Bill Nye's debate last night. Good.
Zarcissa 34
You should be proud, for that kid is going to become a genius! Actually, he may be one already.
dutchy86 20
stay at skool kids!
szf129 6
That's what you get for being a moron.
annie_nk 23
Your 9 year old is awesome. If he learned this from Bill Nye, that's another young mind he has educated.
1947Chevy 17
Nothing has been proven wrong in science. That's the whole concept of science actually it's to only have theories such as gravity. Our whole idea on how the world works is always changing is why
ClearlyImFunny 12
If gravity is just a theory, why don't you just float the **** away :-)
Crazc 15
#60 nobody said theories can't work. even if they did, what you just said was stupid as ****
Dthsapprntc 23
Theory: the analysis of a set of facts in their relation to one another.