Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, there must have been a wasp clinging to my front door because when I walked outside, it dropped between my glasses and my face and began stinging me all around my eye. I don't know if my eye is more swollen from the stings or from me repeatedly punching myself in the face. FML
Today, I was trying to swat a wasp in my bedroom. I got so frustrated that I ended up punching myself in the face. The wasp is still here, and now I look like I've been in a brawl. FML
Today, as I was hanging washing out in the sun, a huge cicada flew into my face and somehow got behind my glasses. I screamed and ripped them off and ran away. I came back to a broken pair of VERY expensive glasses. FML
Today, a gnat hit my forehead, fell into the space between my glasses and my face, and bounced off my eye while trying desperately to escape. When I tried to get my glasses off, it fell into my mask instead, and I accidentally inhaled it. FML
Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML
Today, there was a gigantic wasp in my room. It stupidly flew upwards and got hit by the rotating fan. It then immediately decided to take it's revenge by stinging me. FML
Today, my friend bet everyone at my lunch table that no one could catch the fly that was flying around our table. I reached up and caught it. It was a wasp, and it stung me. FML
Today, I was stung by a wasp. Startled, I stumbled and grabbed a nearby tree branch to regain my balance. The branch happened to be the location of the wasp's nest, which fell to the ground and split open. The wasps weren't happy. FML
Today, there was a wasp tangled in my bed sheets. I found this out when I rolled over it in my sleep, and it stung me on the lower back. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML
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Top comments
Redlawnchair 9
Seriously awesome mental image.
packrat 26
Next time "bee" careful!
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Comments (80)
PenguinBitch 44
Patrick:Firmly grasp it. You got step one done op.
sugarshane007 20
Excuse me while I hit this fly! OW! Son of a!
Enslaved 38
For years I used to think the lyrics were: Excuse me while I kiss-- this guy instead of kiss the sky. I know the lyrics now but still sing it that way in my head. :P
Doodleoodlebug 18
On a live version Hendrix does sing "kiss this guy" =]
kzai 16
I can so visualize this
BadApple88 29
i wish this was a FML video
slayertack 19
Fail on a whole other level.
greenie213 23
That's when you go into zen perfect stillness mode. It'll eventually fly off. Or it will make a nest.
BrandiLush 31
Or it will kill you. Those flying bastards freak me out.
Enslaved 38
Did it leave you in a "Purple Haze"?
29dear 16
Yessss!!!
HowieDoIt 21
I'd say it took off in more of "flight of the bumblebee" style
waffule365 16
This comment is so much win!
mikeymayhem_87 15
OP would probably rather light the wasp on fire instead of his guitar
Tempest151 11
That smart little bastard has been planning it's move for it's entire life, or a few days same difference.
wjh100 13
wait guitars have handles? since when?
machiavelli2 5
Umm, I think you are doing your guitar smashes wrong, aren't you supposed to use the base of the guitar?
mikeymayhem_87 15
How about a bass guitar?