Today, a patient at the hospital I work at had a tracheal tube and couldn't speak. I'm unable to read lips, but I'm pretty sure he was mouthing the words "Stupid bitch" every time I tried to stop him from pulling out his IV. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was treating a patient at the hospital where I'm a dentist. This particular gentleman was old and slightly deaf. After completing the procedure I gestured to the spitoon and asked him to spit. He got up, steadied himself, and spat straight in my face. FML
Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML
Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML
Today, while working at a hospital, I told a patient to smile for the camera when taking an xray. His response was, "I have Bell's Palsy and haven't smiled in 5 years." FML
Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML
Today, I had a dentist appointment in which a nurse numbed my mouth. After coming home, I took a nap in which I unknowing bit through my top lip. I physically can't speak. FML
Today, while working for a hospital security company, I had to assist in restraining a male patient while the nurses put a catheter in him. All I will say is that it looked like a worm trying to swallow a straw. FML
Today, I went to the dentist. My dentist kept talking to me while his hands were in my mouth. I attempted to tell him that it was difficult and dangerous to respond. My talking made him slip and slice my mouth open with one of his instruments. FML
Today, I was working at the hospital and it was very busy. Unthinking, I told a patient in a wheelchair to "sit tight" while I checked on something. He mocked me for the rest of his stay. FML
Today, at the dentist, I was trying to make myself comfortable while he did his thing to my teeth. While my mouth was full of tools, he asked, “So how’s your day going so far?” My reply came out as, “Mrrgh purr blobby noff nay blobby blobby.” The dentist laughed and said, “I was kidding, you’re not supposed to talk right now.” FML
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Top comments
fadingaway 17
You're not a stupid bitch for doing your job.
Brittneyyyy 7
Pull out his tracheal tube and then see what he says.
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Comments (64)
soccerscout7 6
Too bad a patient is a slab of meat, not a customer.
Vegangeekgirl 2
I can't vote because I wouldn't say that your life sucks. But I can't say that you deserved it either, not really. It's just one of the bad sides of taking care of people who are sick and possible confused from the illness/ the drugs they have in their system.
tykiej 0
26, well said! OP, keep your chin up! You are making a difference!!
aback 5
Every time he tries to pull out his IV, yank on his catheter.
anonnie 0
Lol... That sucks. But it comes with the job. And if he takes out his IV, it'll just give you a reason to practice starting IVs. Maybe he'll stop pulling it out when he realizes that more pain will come from it. Remind him that he needs it, and that pulling it out will lead to more needle sticks.
anonnie 0
And @18: Patients can have a trach and still eat. We have patients in the subacute setting that have trachs and eat regular food :)
dixie1958 0
perhaps he was trying to say he had an itch - many patients are tape/adhesive sensitive. Gently remind him of the need for the IV and other medical equipment. If he is able to write, provide him with paper and pen, hold the tablet so he can communicate his needs to you. This may go a long way towards compliance. As others before me have said, we are in a profession requiring compassion. If you are so absorbed in your own self pity, grow up, rethink your career choice, and move on. We all have bad days but please don't take yours out on the patients. They are having a much worse day than you!
DakotaCat 4
Since you can't read lips how do you know he really meant that. Maybe he was saying "scratch my itch"?
mbear24 0
shouldn't the patient have access to an AAC so he can actually communicate? If I had no way of communicating with other people I'd be pretty unhappy too
TheOtherNewest1 6
You know, you kind of are a stupid bitch for complaining about something that minor while someone who is dying (or at least in very bad shape) is right there. I mean, maybe he could be nicer, but the fact that you're complaining about someone on their way out is kinda ******.