Today, a kid grabbed the receiver to my cochlear implant and ran off with it. I went to a security guard, and, if my lip reading was accurate, he said to "try and make it through the day without it". Without it, I can't hear anything. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my brand-new digital hearing aid fell out of my ear as I was walking home from the store. I've retraced my steps, but cannot find it anywhere. It cost $2000, and replacement, like the hearing aid itself, is not covered by insurance. FML
Today, I was taking a bus ride home, listening to some music. The music stopped and I assumed my iPod's battery had run out. Turns out someone managed to steal it, leaving my earphones in. I didn't feel a thing. FML
Today, someone stole my iPhone. I used the Find My iPhone app, and located it in the apartment building next to mine. I can hear the ringing sound I've activated, but nobody will answer the door. FML
Today, while I was at work, a co-worker watched while some kid stole the radio out of my car. FML
Today, somebody grabbed my phone out of my hands and ran away with it. I'm a cross country runner, albeit one with stress fractures, but I was able to catch up with them and get my phone back. Unfortunately, the running aggravated my stress fractures and I have to get a plaster cast. Merry fricking Christmas. FML
Today, I was working at a daycare. There was a 6-year-old boy pretending to be my doctor, holding a little, plastic thermometer. He then, without warning, quickly shoved it deep into my ear. The last thing I heard was his giggle. I think I'm deaf. FML
Today, my phone went missing. My 8-year-old son took it to school and sold it for $10. FML
Today, I bought a mini tracking device to attach to my wallet to keep me from losing it. Unfortunately, before I could put batteries in the tracking device, I lost it. FML
Today, a woman came up to me at a restaurant and asked if her autistic son could borrow my headphones. I agreed, but when they were leaving and I asked for them back, she accused me of trying to steal MY headphones that she BORROWED from me. If not for other people backing me up, I would have lost them. FML
Today, after working out at the gym, I went to grab my bag, and realized that my phone was missing. Panicking, I reached into my pocket, pulled out my phone, and dialed my mom's number to tell her I'd lost it. It took me until the last ring to realize what I was doing. FML
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Top comments
Mortanious 0
I would have made that kid actually have a need to use it.
sapphirenite 0
security guards wont do shit, next time get a police officer
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Comments (202)
Yarrachel 16
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Can you hear me now?
emodude44 0
FAIL
11colio11 4
WAT
2fknreaL 0
You're a disgusting piece of shit.
iHaveADream_ 0
# 1 your a piece of sh*t , that's not nice !
Lady_Zydrate 1
Im OP and i found this a little funny, so get off his back, it was a joke
Yarrachel 16
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Geez, I meant no offense, it was just a joke. And you can't hate me because I have a Doctor Who icon, so there! :)
quite_bored 9
Yeah, guys! He has a Doctor Who profile pic, that just makes him like 90% more uncool.
mozeltov 7
DOCTOR WHO FTW
Yarrachel 16
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
And I'm not a guy!
cowboyy_fml 0
who wants to ride me?
quite_bored 9
Should have admitted to being a guy, you just made your case about 50x worse.
fakeaccountX 6
Her user name is "rachel!" How could you all think that was a guy?
ohthebloodygore 16
I hate 'geez'. Unless you're referring to the language Ge'ez it should not be in your vocabulary.
Gramardam 0
^lul
cwhitney11 4
omfg......my grandma effin posted this....I'll be damned
cookiemobzta 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
O m g how cool is it that you get to wear a little plastic thingy into your brain with a 3.5mm headphone jack. If I were you I would use an auxiliary to hear music 24/7. You are sooo lucky
HateyMcHater 4
See, this is why I go with the unabridged versions: geez-o-Pete, geezum crow, or Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ on a cracker. By the way, you're a pedant.
DocBastard 40
Hatey, are you saying that Gore likes to have sex with pubescent ants?
HateyMcHater 4
I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin' (please no super monkey jokes). And they're not the only vermin! I heard a rumor that she may also be a pederats.
HateyMcHater 4
Heaven help us with all these sodomites coming out of the woodworks.
Bagel09 11
Can you hear me now? good
iamthellamaking 0
STFU ur to loud
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
geeeez I feel really bad for Op and then here comes Yarrachel being a real big fat meanie!
awesomedot1 0
^priceless.
Mortoli 30
Doctor who rules jackass. Come on man.
Mortoli 30
I know it kinda hurtful but I got a crack out of it reminds me of a pic another fmler uses of a dog in another dogs ass with that typed. to #1 btw lol also to op sry that guard is an asshole that is unprofessional like in our business. Hope you complained. I understand in that situation not much you can do but still his wording way off lol.
Mortanious 0
I would have made that kid actually have a need to use it.
Forever_Hyper 0
What is that even supposed to mean?
Buddy360 0
He meant that he would've beat him up
Forever_Hyper 0
I can't believe how ******* clever you all are over here.
Kurg 0
Haha yeah
ashisthebomb 0
that was really dumb
spanelli 16
Actually, it wasn't.
iamthellamaking 0
115 is right
sapphirenite 0
security guards wont do shit, next time get a police officer
iamthellamaking 0
or don't let a kid reach your face
DigitalFusion 4
That's not true. Not all security guards are fat lazy *****. Im a guard and make about three arrests a day on average, I'm so sick of that stereotype when I work my ass off at pay far lower than what it should be.
DocBastard 40
Your lip reading was WAY off. He actually said, "Ryan Yeti through thin a with owl it." Lrn2lip read.
SirEBC 7
My brotha is you serious?
wwerulez14 6
Duh bro hez mad serius....
youngclench 0
he be crazy serious brotha!
ImaginaryFoe 1
I favourited simply because of this thread, brotha.
thejacl 0
Fo real, yo.
yaya1213 6
That secrity guard is mean and rude he should b fired
lolol_BKYCHO 3
That sucks, brah.
cowboyy_fml 0
damn where'd u get them honkers girl? can I lick them?;)
Gramardam 0
^BO.OBIES! kidding see a lot of those at my school nothing special.
Me_iz_a_Bboy 0
The question is who can get some?
dandawg69 0
Lolz x 3 ^^^
tr827653 2
I want to know what they said lol
Arraggatis 0
#105, they could have been commenting on the looks of #9. It happens a lot.
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
haha same here 105 same here
Me_iz_a_Bboy 0
we commented on her watermelons
KittehSayzRAWR 0
Damn terrorist these days, instead of killing people they just mentally torture them. What a sad way to go...
starrs_movingIn 0
LMAO, agreed
wtfimnotgay 0
lol, soumds like it was a deafdefying situation! xD
indianajones103 2
*da dum tuss*
tuninggamer 0
*desert rose passes*
Jewelofagal 2
Given his response, I presume the security guard was at your school. Clearly, you needed to go to the school office for help.
Lady_Zydrate 1
they treat me like a special ed kid there because i need a magnet to hear. my parents try to explain that im like everyone else, but their deaf too without an implant so they're taken even less seriously. we deaf get no respect
ashisthebomb 0
aww I'm sorry my sister is deaf and she goes to school for it and she's 3 so I'm pretty sure she doesn't have any problems with school yet
duma191 21
I went to school with a deaf girl and we managed to turn one of her old transmitters into a mp3 hookup. it was a lot of fun and she's a cool chick.
madreedy 7
f*uck them both!!!