Today, a girl I've had a huge crush on for a long time told another friend of ours to get a life. I, in my infinite genius responded that her mom needed to get a life. She ran out of the room bawling. I got slapped in the face and informed that her mom had died not long ago. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having coffee with an old friend I hadn't seen since university. I asked about her husband; she replied, "He died" and walked off. I was confused, so I stood up and took off after her. She then reminded me that I was at his funeral, and then slapped me in the face. FML
Today, I was talking to my crush on MSN. She was telling me how her friend had passed away recently. I had two chats open and accidentally replied, "That's hilarious." FML
Today, during a text conversation with a girl I've been trying to get with, she complained about how crummy of a day she was having. I told her it couldn't be as bad as she thought, and she would probably get it over it soon. Then she told me she had found out her cousin had been murdered. FML
Today, I told the woman that I've had a crush on for some time how I felt. She laughed so hard that water sprayed from her nose and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
Today, my crush started uploading pictures and writing sweet messages about a girl on her status, so I assumed that she was into girls, and lost all hope. Turns out that the girl in question had passed away, and she was remembering her. FML
Today, my best friend told me he had a crush on someone in my house. I got excited, but he told me it was my mom. FML
Today, at school, some kid I’ve never liked came up to me and said, to my face, "I’m really happy to hear about your mom." She died two weeks ago. FML
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
Today, I was speaking to an old friend and I asked her how her mother was. She replied, "She passed away, you came to her funeral last month." FML
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Top comments
sensual_kidney 0
you're a good man for sticking up for your friend. If she can throw out shit, then she needs to be able to take shit back. Sounds like she wouldn't turn out to be that great of a girlfriend anyway. move on, you can do better.
imdacsgrrl 0
Uhhh, if you have such a huge crush on her why the hell don't you know her mom died? You don't know anything about her do you?
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Comments (82)
mystic_star 0
the best insult you could think of was the old "your mom?"
Exposi 1
GIRL: "You need to get a life". YOU: (being SO smart and SO cool and I love you) "Your MOM needs to get a life!" Here's how it should have gone from here: GIRL: "What? Did you say something, pathetic loser who's obsessed with me, but has no chance because he's fat and ugly and lives with his mother? Sorry, I couldn't hear you." YOU: "I said your mom needs to get a life..." GIRL: [pulls out gun] "I'm going to do the world a favor and end your retarded existence, you worthless tiny little man". Can you guess what happens next, moron?
blahblahmonsturr 0
omg epic win xD
Deathnote17 0
Haha i hate your mom jokes. ughhh. But at least me and my best friend sarah are cuteee(:
Lolzords 11
He's got a point, if she's dead, she could do with a life.
chickletno1 0
I'm sorry but that's funneh
rawr_etf 0
you couldn't have known about her mom unless someone told you, but YDI for actually being immature enough to use a 'your mom' joke past age 6.
123whyme 0
it's not your fault, she shouldn't have insulted you first. I guess it's out of habit when you say 'your mom' sentences LOL!
WhosGOTtheHERB 0
that's the coolest thing I've heard
n4vjot 0
Bros before hoes.