Today, a dog attacked me. Its owner, instead of apologizing and helping me, said it was my own fault for making it think I was an attacker by running past them. We were on a jogging track. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Today, knowing very well that I need to be more active, I went for a walk. It quickly turned into a sprint when I was attacked and chased by a dog. FML
Today, while on my run, I was attacked by my neighbor's new dog. It apparently didn't like me running past their house and broke free from its chain. I now have stitches and was just told that I'm probably being taken to court for the emotional distress I caused her and the dog. FML
Today, I saw a dog trying to attack a man. I have experience working with aggressive dogs, so I pulled the dog off him and got it under control. The man punched me in the face for not having my dog on a leash. It wasn't my dog. I don't even own a dog. FML
Today, I was mauled by my own dog. I own a Chihuahua. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog, some self-righteous animal activist berated me on how it was animal abuse to put my dog on a leash. Despite warning her, she crouched down to undo it, my dog charged at her, giving her a gash on the cheek. She kicked my dog for it, and is now threatening to sue me. FML
Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when I tripped on the leash, dropping his treat bag. He snatched one, looked at me, and ran full speed in the opposite direction. I had to chase him for three blocks, yelling his name. He thought it was a new game. FML
Today, I attempted a casual jog in my neighborhood. Halfway through, my shoelace snapped, and I tripped, skidding across someone’s lawn. The homeowner rushed out, not to help, but to ask why I was “attacking” their grass. FML
Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML
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Top comments
MolesterStallone 13
I would have punched him in the face...
zandalee 20
You need to report him and the dog. Imagine if it had been a child that this dog had attacked! It will attack again. Sounds like it has before judging by the owners response!
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Comments (109)
klx125cross 9
That bitch is a bitch!!
KiddNYC1O 22
Maybe the dog wasn't digging your Usain Bolt cockiness...
fatalwish 6
judo chop that air thief in the throat next time op.
Toothbrush12 9
52- firstly, you should not be doing judo outside a dojo, unless a human is attacking you. Secondly, there is no such thing as a "judo chop". Judo is a grappling sport, consisting of throws, trips, footsweeps and hold-downs. I don't have a clue about other martial arts, but I think that the "chops" that you envision are more for karate. Thirdly, it is illegal to do judo without a license, and we don't know if OP had a license. Fourthly, it takes AGES to learn judo techniques. You get the picture? Lol... I'm sorry about this comment!
nickolascronk 3
Sue his ass off
sajupt 17
U shud have beaten the owner n dog to death...
bRower 3
Someone has already beaten your spelling, so why not a dog?
Darkme 1
that owner is retarded
skyeyez9 25
In the neighborhood I grew up in, egotistical fuckwits had pit bulls, and let them roam loose to maul kids and the elderly. I don't know why the most incompetent people choose pit bulls. Then act surprised when they attack. Pits should only be owned by a competent and experienced owner who properly trains them.
cnn123 1
I hate when they don't tie up their animals especially when they can be dangerous.
SammyS2012 21
Those darn Hell Hounds...
supportcommand 17
Ya that bites. Quit dogging it and faster. K. Nine more laps.
supportcommand 17
* run