Today, I boarded a plane. A woman decided that she didn't like where she'd put her carry on luggage and pulled it out from over my head. The heavy luggage then fell right onto my face, the wheel smacking me in the mouth and busting my lip open. She just laughed and waltzed away without a word. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML
Today, I was getting onto an airplane and happened to admire the stewardess. I was walking onto the plane and was just about to talk to her when my foot slipped into the crack between the boarding ramp and the plane. Not only did she laugh as I limped to my seat but now I have bruised nuts. FML
Today, I was sitting next to a lady on an airplane who was very overweight. She fell asleep on me, and violently bled from her nose upon take off and landing. FML
Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML
Today, on a flight, a woman in a crop top reached up to get her bag from the overhead locker and her breasts ended up on top of my head for like a second. Total accident, no biggie. That was six days ago, we fly home tomorrow, and my wife hasn’t spoken a word to me since the breast thing. FML
Today, I was sitting in the airport, watching the baggage handlers load the plane I was about to get on. They were being really rough with it, one bag came open and all the clothes spilled out onto the tarmac. The clothes looked familiar. They were mine. FML
Today, I was supposed to fly home for my dad's funeral, but the woman in the seat next to me was so obese, her bulging flesh left absolutely no way for me to sit in my seat. I complained to the stewardess, who then forced me to leave the plane just for raising my voice in frustration. FML
Today, I was on the bus during rush hour. A fly started buzzing around my head, and I swatted at it, at the exact moment the woman beside me decided to get out of her seat and put her face straight in the path of my hand. FML
Today, while I was on the bus, my foot fell asleep. When we arrived at my stop, I stood up and limped to the front of the bus. As I walked down the steps, I tripped, fell, and smashed my nose into the ground. The driver just laughed and drove away. FML
Today, to keep my phone safe while I went on some rides, I took it out of my pocket so I could put it in my bag. Just as I pulled it out, a woman ran into me, knocking my phone to the ground and breaking the screen. FML
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Top comments
OhWhoCares 42
I feel for you OP. Half the struggle of flying is having to deal with the general public and shit like this happens. Hopefully your lip heals quickly. Although I'm not so sure I would've been able to hold myself together long enough to let her just waltz away after hurting my face...
Econforthwin 15
I know it's the wrong response but I would have thrown the nearest thing at her. Peanuts, souvenir, or baby.
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Comments (107)
MiJiT 1
I would've calmly walk up behind her and snapped her neck!! :)
dagarr 11
bitch
JackDupp 11
You should've stood over her dripping blood from your busted lip.
lovemybabies3 3
I wouldve punched her
cjfred 13
Hey, give her credit for busting your lip in style. She could have simply walked away, but she waltzed instead. (Personally, I'd have gone with a nice sashay, though.)
gamernation89 10
This is why I really don't fly on planes I prefer trains if I can even though it does take a lot longer to get to the destination but people aren't much as a jerk and safer but I hope you contacted someone for that much pain
The_Avatar 22
If you can afford it even business class is better than coach. First class truly is amazing.
TechnoStew 21
My rule: if you hit me with it, it's mine.
nela25 23
Wow, I would have been like "excuse my head for being in your way". Some people I tell you smh.
bryce0110 23
I would just go up behind her, kick her in the ass and punch her in the face, laugh at her and waltz away without saying a word.