Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I boarded a plane. A woman decided that she didn't like where she'd put her carry on luggage and pulled it out from over my head. The heavy luggage then fell right onto my face, the wheel smacking me in the mouth and busting my lip open. She just laughed and waltzed away without a word. FML
Today, I helped an elderly woman carry her suitcase down a flight of stairs. When I got to the bottom, a man tackled me to the ground thinking I was stealing the woman's luggage. As I lay in pain, he ran up the stairs to return the suitcase and the poor woman had to carry it down on her own. FML
Today, I was at the airport baggage collection when I saw an old man struggling to get his very old and heavy suitcase off the belt before giving up. I had already collected my bag, but wanting to be helpful, the old man watched me as I grabbed his handle, yanked and snapped it clean off. FML
Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML
Today, I swung my arm with a product in my hand, and the product flew out of the packaging and hit an old lady on her head. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML
Today, at work, an elderly lady came up to the cash register with a flyer in her hand, and asked if we had a certain item. I told her we did not have any left, and we would be getting more next week and if she wanted, I could give her a rain check. She hit me in the face with her purse. FML
Today, I helped an elderly lady put a bookshelf in her car. She then thanked me by hitting me with her car as she drove out of the parking lot. FML
Today, I was at the airport when I saw a woman drop her bags and run to her husband. Thinking that someone might steal them, I picked up her bags and brought them over to her. She thanked me by slapping me, calling me a bitch and calling security. FML
Today, I saw an old man struggling with three bags, so I offered to carry them for him. He must not have heard me because when I bent down to take the bags, he thought I was stealing them and punched me in the face. FML
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Top comments
FunkyAndFresh 7
Smooth.. Real smooth.
elephantom12 9
Shit happens, you had good intentions. I hope the old woman is ok though.
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Comments (90)
FunkyAndFresh 7
Smooth.. Real smooth.
BarDownDaily 12
I really wish that people had enough room in the FML to write what happens in the moments right after the FML.
JacobWithaY 5
Was she ran over by a... Wait, totally has nothing to do..
Zeppelin1969 5
It's better to hit people that you will likely never see again then hitting someone that you may have to deal with a lot, like your boss, or a girlfriend/boyfriend, or parent.
Jakesterk96 8
Uh oh, a new game on adult swim.
123josie123 11
Lol!! I can sort of picture it. Fyl OP and fherlife too.
GrooveTurtle 0
Smooth, like keith stone?
BeefyQueef 5
I laughed out loud at this fml
GoW_Chick 15
Pow! Right in the kisser.
goaliemkl123 8
I want to call op a dbag, but c'mon, that's hilarious. And there's no way he did it on purpose....
brown4lifejot 1
1- your name, post, and picture all match! This fml made me lol
UrLyfSuxx 0
Apologize
alyspar2 5
Wtf do you think he did? Laugh?! Of course he apologized.
SillyFart 7
I bet the old woman loved getting smacked in the face
airforce987 20
I'm sure getting smacked in the face reminded her of her younger days...
HetaliaFreak 10
The feeling........is almost.......orgasmic. No one remembers Salad Fingers?? No? Ok......
elephantom12 9
Shit happens, you had good intentions. I hope the old woman is ok though.
ColdplaySucks 18
If a bus driver is taking kids to school but hits a tree, drives into a lamppost, and rears a truck, you don't say he has good intentions. You get a new bus driver.
MedKits 9
If all that happens, there's probably more at play then just bad luck.
K_kanaka 26
Ouch
markrs 0
Most action she's gotten all century. Next she'll ask you to hold the bag of ice to her face, meaning you push that sucker hard and make it hurt!!! O.o oh wait, that's just my fantasy.
rocker_chick105 31
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
"Boarding" a plane means getting on it, not hitting someone. Next time, make sure you know your references.
elephantom12 9
Wtf? Can you read and grasp the concept of what you're reading?
MaaaanWTF 1
Two words: READING COMPREHENSION. Next time, read more thoroughly before trying to correct others. I don't like stupid people, so if you don't want to be thumbed down, brush up on your smarts please!
leogirl95 12
Last time I checked "boarding" a plane meant getting on a plane.
RaggleFrock 13
You're still boarding the plane until the moment you sit and do up you seat belt.
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5
6 - Yeah um... Communication problem much?
periwinkle95 10
You're so stupid. Yeah, boarding as in getting in your seat and having your bags packed up in the overhead. Stupid people these days, so ignorant.
AssassinsCRB 0
Rofl #6 is an idiot
XmyviolentheartX 13
Did they kick you off the plane for assault? =P
yahoowizard 16
TSA seized the bag as a weapon and classified him as a terrorist, ofc
559NVUS 3
Shit happens, apologize and move on...it's not like you did it on purpose, right?
Buttsexpirate 9
Finish Her! Bagality!
isallwaysme 27
Fatality!!!!
chili10 18
I love how this was phrased. I can just picture op with a huge smile on his face and over enthusiastically trying to lift the suitcase.
xoxogossipgirl9 6
then picture op's face after he hit her...
ChildOfEden1 0
Don't feel bad man u tried to do good with no intention of doing any harm so whateva happens it ain't ur fault...
HetaliaFreak 10
RUSSIA
HetaliaFreak 10
RUSSIA!