Today, my girlfriend said she hates my feet and it’s a real turn off. It’s got to the point where if she sees my feet in bed she won’t sleep in the same bed as me. I hate wearing socks in bed, so not sure how we can resolve this. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend about my foot phobia. To help me "get over it", he took his socks off, pinned me down, and rubbed his foot against my face until I started sobbing. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who recently moved in with me, has opted to sleep on the couch rather than in the same bed as me. She claims it’s because "her body" won’t let her fall asleep unless she’s alone. FML
Today, after wearing high heels all day, I took them off in the car, and sat cross-legged. My husband immediately threw a fit beside me, claiming my feet were disgusting and "smelled bad." He pulled into a parking lot and threatened to leave me there unless I put them back on. FML
Today, I found out why my girlfriend of 8 months has never agreed to stay the night before. Now I have a 4-month old mattress that needs replacing, and a 23-year-old bedwetter for a girlfriend. FML
Today, I opened my front door to be greeted by what I can only describe as the stink of death. After moving furniture and lifting floorboards, frantically searching for whatever had died, I finally discovered the actual source of the stench - my girlfriend's feet. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went to see a horror movie. It ended up scaring her so badly that she refused to leave our bed all night long, even to pee. I have to clean the mattress now. FML
Today, my girlfriend won't stay over at my apartment anymore. Why? Because she saw a few roaches. Pest control comes every week and I spray every other day, so there's only so much I can about it. The worst part is now it's extremely difficult to spend time together because she lives with her mom and sister, who argue nonstop. FML
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Top comments
Nix188 13
she ain't the one. find a person who enjoys you for you and isn't worried so much about feet. also, clean your feet. oh, you already do? do it more sucka, they're dirty.
andrewgr 4
I once had a girlfriend say something similar, but not carry it out so far. It turns out, as I discovered years later, that I had toenail fungus. I had had it my whole life, so I didn't know my feet weren't supposed to look and smell that way. I assume (in retrospect) that she was too embarrassed to just tell me what the real problem is. If there's any chance something similar might be going on, and she doesn't want to talk about it, and you have decent insurance, you might see if your regular doctor will refer you to a podiatrist for a checkup. But hopefully if you just asked her point blank if she suspects you might have a foot condition (athlete's foot, whatever), she could find the moxy to tell you, even though it's awkward.
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Comments (13)
Marcella1016 32
Ask her for specifics and maybe try getting a pedicure? And keep your feet under the covers. Sorry you guys are going through this. If you do get the pedicure, maybe she’ll be happy with your effort and help foot the bill.
Nix188 13
she ain't the one. find a person who enjoys you for you and isn't worried so much about feet. also, clean your feet. oh, you already do? do it more sucka, they're dirty.
slhiggx 17
Pedicure
Chazzster 32
Maybe clip your toenails and take a shower or bath?
Brightside86 31
How crazy are your feet? Also this seems like a made up reason to create distance because she's already sleeping with your best friend...if I know this site at all.
andrewgr 4
I once had a girlfriend say something similar, but not carry it out so far. It turns out, as I discovered years later, that I had toenail fungus. I had had it my whole life, so I didn't know my feet weren't supposed to look and smell that way. I assume (in retrospect) that she was too embarrassed to just tell me what the real problem is. If there's any chance something similar might be going on, and she doesn't want to talk about it, and you have decent insurance, you might see if your regular doctor will refer you to a podiatrist for a checkup. But hopefully if you just asked her point blank if she suspects you might have a foot condition (athlete's foot, whatever), she could find the moxy to tell you, even though it's awkward.
jforhan 12
LT Dan
palequeen8942 1
tell her to grow tf up (:
RichardPencil 32
Amputation. You can get those cool Oscar Pistorius blades -- just don't murder your girlfriend.
meghang220 14
Wtf do your feet look like that she won’t even sleep in the same bed as you???