Today, I went to visit my best friend at her house. I saw her five year-old brother playing in the front yard, and as I walked up to the door he shouted, "Boobs are here! Boobs are here!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was playing with my 5 year-old neighbor. I was changing and he saw me naked. Then he went home and his parents came over. Apparently, he told them that I have beautiful boobs. FML
Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year-old son answered the door and when he saw me said, "Oh great, it's YOU!" and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, I was hanging out at a friend's house. Her adorable 5 year-old sister came up, gave me a hug, and said, "You're fat. When are you going home?" FML
Today, I was holding my 3 year old brother, and apparently he thinks it's hilarious to pull my tank top down and scream ''BOOBS!'' in public. FML
Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My best friend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML
Today, I experienced the horror of walking in on my best friend fondling his tits. Yes, "his". FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Today, after explaining to my two year old that we were going bra shopping, he decided to announce to the entire bank that we were going to buy Mommy some boobies. FML
Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML
Today, after swimming in the pool, I went into the shower. Little did I know that my niece was hiding in there. She excitedly yelled "I saw your boobs!" Now my nephew won't stop crying because he didn't get to see them as well. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
That kid needs to watch more Sesame Street and less Family Guy.
Emma1562 35
At least you're not a guy...
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Comments (63)
BandsRuleBro 11
Depending on how old he is, he may not even know what boobs are yet. I wouldn't sweat it OP.
Recon13x 9
he is 5
Le_ponderer 14
You need to tell your friend before that becomes a problem (for him especially)... On the flip side, let that be a compliment unto you (secretly-in-your-heart); you will never need to worry about certain items -Chicken Cutlet/Falsies- falling out of or slipping down your outfit.
emlizcat 21
Take it as a complement
rick159 12
Good boy!
healthcarechick 9
I'm sorry but that's really funny bc an old friend of mine could never get her baby to sleep and she had very very small boobs but as soon as I rocked the baby for two minutes she was passed out. So my friend had her daughter calling me aunt ****! ?
Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20
that should be your fml name. And any other online nickmane. No really, if someone gave me the nickname 'aunt ****' I'd call me that on EVERY website. Despite being a guy
chewsef 17
Pics or it didn't happen. Jus sayn.
ayyylmaoo 6
u shud bang him when he grows up
sandman676 20
Kids always speak what that hear it's a reflection of what your friend said
JigglesGirl 19
My irl nickname is Jiggles cause I have big boobs. And sometimes, my cousin's baby cousin had admitted that he likes sitting with me cause my "big boobs are nice"
Forrice 12
at least you have nice boobs :D