Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. FML
Today, I got a mosquito bite under each armpit. FML
Today, I decided to lay out and tan. I fell asleep and got sun burned and bitten numerous times by mosquitoes. If I scratch my itch, the burn hurts terribly. If I don't scratch it, it itches terribly. FML
Today, I was laying out in my backyard trying to get some color when I felt a little tickle on my lips. I rubbed them together to satisfy the itch, when I felt a sort of crunchiness popping between them. I had crushed a spider between my lips and its legs were still moving. FML
Today, I decided to sunbathe in my backyard in an attempt to be healthy. The result? Insect bites over my body. Somehow, despite being fully clothed the entire time, my scrotum also received several bites. FML
Today, I was with my kids. We saw a tiny little bug and they started freaking out. Trying to show them that bugs are not scary, I picked it up. It bit me and now I have to go to the doctor because my hand is the size of a balloon. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for what I thought was a persistent bug bite. Turns out it was a mole I'd never noticed. I had been scratching it then applying anti-itch cream for weeks. FML
Today, I got a bug bite on my boob. I scratched it so much it started bleeding so I put a bandaid on it. Turns out the band-aid had latex in it and I got an allergic reaction to it. The bug bite is still bleeding and the top half of my boob is swollen. FML
Today, I had an unbearable itch on my foot that I could not make go away with my nails, so I grabbed the stapler in my drawer to scratch it with. Bad idea. FML
Today, I noticed a small bite on my arm. I couldn't figure out what it came from until I saw a small insect crawling out of my bra. FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
You should've bought one of the unbreakable ones then eh? Ir's a general rule-r of thumb not to stick anything long and losable into any deep crevice or hole.
Shortay123 14
My friend got an eraser stuck inside his cast and he had to get the cast taken off and get a new one on because it was causing him so much discomfort. When they took it off he had a HUGE bruise where the eraser was. So I would suggest you go get that out immediately because it might affect your healing process. And how did you get a mosquito bite there anyway? Did it happen before?
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Comments (46)
LyraAlluse 25
One time when I wore a cast, I lost about five dollars in quaters down it when I was emptying out a change jar in my room.This was not the most intelligent thing I've done in life...
noraaa35 4
This is by far one of the funniest FML's haha but good luck with the ruler in there!
ADTRftw 10
Stick+Piece of tape= broken ruler retriever. =)
bluerhhajfk 17
Just move your leg up and it'll fall out
733yoda_fml 19
Hope you feel better
KiterallyImFine 12
I feel your pain. except worse mine was my arm after a fall into a friend's pool with a pen cap being the item that got lodged in it.