Today, somebody parked an old truck with "FDIC" stickers on the sides in front of the bank I work at. I've been dealing with panicked customers all day, my manager says that the whole bank is at risk, and we can't find who parked the truck there. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after a couple of months of enjoying an informal parking arrangement with a local bank, I found out they sold their extra lot without telling me. The new owner's towing company heard about the deal, though. FML
Today, I drove to Bank of America to deposit money. Upon returning to my car I saw some new scratches on the front. I kicked and rubbed it to try and get rid of it. Then I notice someone in the car staring at me in bewilderment. I'd parked 2 spaces away. We have the same car. FML
Today, I was sitting in my old rusty truck in an empty parking lot, when some old lady parks beside me and opens her door, hitting my truck. Having a used up truck, I didn't mind. But you could tell that it made her mad, when she came back with the manager demanding that I pay for her paint job. FML
Today, when leaving my apartment, I instantly noticed there was a giant dump truck in our lot, which turned out to be directly behind my car. After making a 20-point escape from my parking space and getting to work late, my roommate texts me, "DUDE guess what I got last night." A giant dump truck. FML
Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML
Today, I was parking my car outside of my apartment, but the big truck next to the spot went over the line. I squeezed in anyway. Later, I discovered the truck had left and someone keyed my car. They left a note saying, "Good parking job, asshole." FML
Today, I've owned my dream car for 11 days. Someone backed into it while it parked at work, and drove away without leaving a note. A man at a nearby business knows who did it but won't tell me because it was one of his customers. FML
Today, I found out we have new neighbors in our apartment complex that park in the stall next to our truck. Turns out their car is the same make of our truck. And it also turns out that when I unlock our truck it will set off their car alarm - every time. FML
Today, while I was backing out of the my work's parking lot, I hit my boss's truck. While he was in it. FML
Today, thanks to Grand Theft Auto, I found myself seriously thinking about holding up an armored bank truck when I saw it in traffic. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Maybe letting forgetful Uncle Billy handle $8000 in the bank's cash was a bad idea? I'm surprised with all of the high-tech mattresses these days that people aren't using them to store their life savings under. What do you mean a memory foam mattress can't track withdrawals and deposits? It has memory!
Taurus_ChicKa 37
If it's an old truck, I doubt it's legit. You can't tell me an FDIC worker wouldn't have a new car.
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Comments (2)
RichardPencil 32
Maybe letting forgetful Uncle Billy handle $8000 in the bank's cash was a bad idea? I'm surprised with all of the high-tech mattresses these days that people aren't using them to store their life savings under. What do you mean a memory foam mattress can't track withdrawals and deposits? It has memory!
Taurus_ChicKa 37
If it's an old truck, I doubt it's legit. You can't tell me an FDIC worker wouldn't have a new car.