The candidate
Today, I had my first job interview in months. The guy chuckled mockingly at my master's degree in philosophy and wound up admitting that he had no idea why I'd even been selected to be interviewed. FML
Today, I had my first job interview in months. The guy chuckled mockingly at my master's degree in philosophy and wound up admitting that he had no idea why I'd even been selected to be interviewed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to an important job interview, only to be told I'm not what such a "prestigious" company was looking for. This from a pimply-faced 20-something who took a personal call on speakerphone mid-interview, and actually said "LMAO" out loud at his friend's joke. FML
Today, I went to my first job interview. I didn't think I was doing too badly, until the interviewer said, "Wait a second, you're in high school?" I explained that the guy who'd called me had said that this wouldn't be a problem. I then watched as my interviewer left his desk to "deal" with him. FML
Today, I had my first job interview since graduating from university. The person who interviewed me informed me that not using my degree after two years practically makes it null and void. I guess instead of being a financial advisor at the company, I could always be a janitor there. FML
Today, I went to a job interview. I never applied for the job, they'd sought me out, had a phone interview, and sent samples, all before the face-to-face interview. Turns out none of the people I met with had even read my resume or writing samples. I was told I might not be a good fit. FML
Today, I had a job interview with a world-renowned forensic psychologist, and it fits my degree perfectly. He didn't want to hire me, but he'd like me to return as a patient. FML
Today, I had a job interview, for which I spent hours preparing. My interviewer was nothing more than a pimple-faced teen, and after only two minutes of reviewing my qualifications, he lost interest and started asking such questions as which Hogwarts house is my favorite. FML
Today, I had my first job interview for eight months. My interviewer noticeably yawned during my reply to the first question. FML
Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML
Today, I had a job interview. The moment I walked into the room, the interviewer said, "OK, I will interview you, but there is no way I'm hiring you." FML
Today, after months of unemployment, I got an interview. It went great until the recruiter asked if I had questions. Trying to sound thoughtful, I asked, "What do employees dislike most about working here?" The recruiter laughed and said, "That's a unique way to phrase that." I spent the rest of the interview wondering why my brain chose violence at the worst possible moment. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Bluepies 24
Yeah, I'm in the "You had not one, but two chances to major in something useful" camp. What did you expect?
tigerisabelle 31
You should philosophize about why certain portions of mankind feel the need to be dicks
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (46)
tigerisabelle 31
You should philosophize about why certain portions of mankind feel the need to be dicks
Accurate_Vision 31
I philosophize that a portion of men feel the need to be dicks to make up for the organ which they lack in their crotch. As for women, I have no clue. I'm a man, we were never meant to understand women.
noonenoeone 22
@30 You don't sound like you understand men or women... I also don't understand your reference to the organ that "they lack in their crotch". If they are a man with a crotch there is an organ there...? No philosophy is required; the human mind is wired to thrive on negativity thus people enjoy being dicks.
bandaidstations 28
I avoid people like you like the plague. If you thrive on negativity you're a toxic person.
jtfrisch 22
Holy shit I didn't know that this many people, especially on this super politically correct liberal site, would completely shit on philosophy like this. Although yes it's not practical in our world today but like this person made their decision and there's no point in ******** on it
TheFount 21
well it was a shitty decision... if one is to have a masters degree in philosophy, there is a reasonable expectation that they know they spent a lot of money getting a degree that will make it difficult for them to become gainfully employed.
Accurate_Vision 31
#59, there's two things you need to acquire. One is the ever elusive Sense of Humour. It is very rare nowadays. Secondly, you need an education in the human anatomy. The penis is an organ. Only men have penises. I was joking saying that jerks don't have penises, therefore insulting their masculinity. Also, I understand men perfectly due to the fact I am one. I, however, do not understand women, even after dating a girl for over a year and living with multiple female family members. Many men can probably agree with me there. Also, I'm no philosopher and I wasn't insulting philosophy. I was just making a harmless joke at no one's expense except for jerks.
Ramisme 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You deserve it for majoring in ******* philosophy.
tarlax 11
Better than majoring in being a ********. Rage harder, loser.
DLBL 23
Learn what rage means, loser.
itscomplicated15 6
I really want to believe that he meant OP deserves the job... Trying really hard right here...
TripleATeam 13
#9, no need to validate their statement. #2 is just a dick.
killmenow03 21
Or we could all live in the real world and admit that #2 is right even if he was a dick about it. I mean, how can you expect to get a job with a philosophy degree when people who majored in higher demanding areas can't even get a job??
tantanpanda 26
Can you really think of a job that requires philosophy? You only get a masters or PhD in philosophy if you're going to teach it at a university. At least Psychology and sociology have jobs to go into. To be honest, basket weaving would probably have been a better major to go in.
gobiteme2 34
^19 Might have added a couple of smiley faces to the interview if they had gone in for the harder under water degree
ShirtlessWonder 17
Seriously, I mean if you aren't getting the degree so you can find a job then by all means go for that philosophy degree, but if you expected to get a job out of it... how did you pick your major with such little research or thought?
chinaski7628 32
A philosophy degree teaches you how to think and reason, not to mention write, structure, and support arguments. People with philosophy degrees become lawyers, teachers, writers/journalists, data analyzers, media consultants, think tank runners, CEOs, innovators, and inventors. As a liberal arts major (and philosophy minor), I get irritated when people down play things like philosophy, literature, history, and art. Studying those things teaches you critical thinking skills, abstract reasoning, and problem solving. The only useless degree is the one where you learn nothing and don't grow as a human.
thisguy22 33
@41 While I agree that philosophy is a great foundation for many fields, it doesn't serve well as a degree in and of itself. Most of the jobs you listed require degrees of their own. Maybe minoring in philosophy while majoring in something else will suit you better, but a masters is philosophy isn't very practical.
interesting33 37
Philosophy has transferrable skills. It teaches you to have an open mind, to be able to debate, negotiate, recognise the other person's view point and and think critically as well as tackle complex issues.
Hieroglyph 13
You wasted your time and hopefully just your own money
TAntobella 14
You are totally fight, I can't believe the ignorance of these comments
kuzzy00 22
Teaches you how to debate, reason, critically analyse, innovate? Lol we learnt how to do these things growing through life, and specialised in high school. Any university degree will teach you that things are mathematics. Art history literature, and not economic mainstream thus difficult (almost pointless) to make money off.
chinaski7628 32
Successful people with philosophy degrees: Phil Jackson (basketball coach), Steve Martin (actor/writer), Alex Trebek (game show host), David Foster Wallace (writer), Bruce Lee (actor), Carly Fiorina (politician/CEO), Angela Davis (activist), Peter Thiel (PayPal CEO), Patrick Byrne (overstock.com founder/CEO), Carl Icahn (activist/investor) Stewart Butterfield (Flickr co-founder/CEO), Gene Siskel (film critic), Sheila Bair (former head of the FDIC), Herbert Allison (Fannie Mae CEO), George Soros (former head of the Bank of England), Ricky Gervais (comic/writer/actor), George Levin (former CEO of Time Warner). Granted, not all of these are entirely ethical, but the world would be dull without them and their "worthless" degrees. Education is what you make of it.
deathperado 0
Well almost all of them are self employed or entertainers. Just supports that you don't master philosophy if you want a job instead.^^
ShirtlessWonder 17
#79 OK, that doesn't really prove anything for a ton of reasons. 1. Compare that to the number of successful people who majored in other things... you might find way more of them on other majors. 2. Those people are almost all self-employed. OP obviously isn't. 3. Nobody said philosophy is bad, but what we are saying is that if you expect to find a job easily, you obviously didn't think things through very well.
slavka012 11
It did not teach you to think very well. To tell that people with ph degree become all that you mention is like saying "people with short hair become all of those". They do, but not due to the short hair, or the ph degree
Mr_Mole 24
I learnt all those things by getting a job. Practical skills are far better than a degree in something that is overlooked by the majority of the professional world.
christian1509 21
What job were you applying for?
gracehi 33
I'm guessing it wasn't a position as a philosopher.
Bluepies 24
What position as a philosopher?
Thatissarcastic 17
#12 Are there really any careers in this field?
gobiteme2 34
^21 There is if you don't mind holding a sign as the last person in a check out line.
Anikaaaaa 31
#12 well there are some jobs for which philosophers are suitable. Like being an ethics coach or a researcher. Getting a master in philosophy also signifies that you have a certain level of thinking, which is valuable in many jobs. (BTW I'm a student of economics and law myself)
enginsteve 17
so, if you are a philosopher is it a job or a way of life?
friedpwnadge 25
31, if you have a degree in math, is it a job or a way of life? Are there jobs out there for Math? "what do you do?" "oh, I am head of the Math position at a big company." Degrees often provide useful skills, even if they are not directly relatable to a job position.
tbro47 23
#44 It'd be more likely to get a degree in finance or accounting. I've never even heard of someone getting a "math" degree, but I do know that finance and accounting majors have an easier time finding jobs after college and they actually make good money from the beginning.
happyturtle 16
#44 are you serious? not every degree means you should be a director of that field. if you don't see how mathematicians are valuable and very much needed in tech, science, industrie etc your loss. but mathematicians sure as hell don't deserve to be compared to a philosophy major. it's a stupid degree and the only reason people should be majoring it if they are not planning to have a career in it, just want a degree that proves they are "intelectuals".
jtfrisch 22
Lol a lot of people major in specific fields of math, and they call themselves math majors
militarybrat 21
#51 my husband has a degree in applied mathematics. He got it for free and got a stipend (roughly $600 a month) the last two years in college. Why? Because the Air Force paid for it. He was an officer when he graduated and had to put in four years at the minimum.
myselfkk 20
So quote descartes to him "In order to be certain doubt everything"
spicyburrito 18
Probably because you were overqualified, I'm assuming.
jvanevery 19
you knew what you were doing when you chose philosophy as a study path , but your degree says that you can think correctly rationally logically it seems like that ought to be worthwhile in any environment
Kiernan151 25
Well, I wouldn't say in any environment majoring in philosophy doesn't give that many career choices, like if he was applying to be a lawyer, a philosophy degree would be useless.
Burton_Forever 23
Don't worry about him op he probably doesn't have a masters degree in anything other than self pleasure... keep your head up!
itscomplicated15 6
Or maybe he does have one. Something like Master's Degree in being an a-hole!
ShirtlessWonder 17
A bachelor's in something relevant to the job is more important than a master's that isn't.
aldoshoes 4
Maybe not, but he does have a job. I know what I'd prefer.
dvp_fml 8
but he has a job. Masters in philosophy. - zero Having job. - win
Bluepies 24
Yeah, I'm in the "You had not one, but two chances to major in something useful" camp. What did you expect?
FMLGriff 8
sorry op, but you chose the worthless degree... not the interviewer...
ligerzero459 24
Cold as hell, but you're totally right. You can't complain about not being marketable when you chose a degree that makes you unmarketable
stormy0307 16
Cold, but I'm with you. I graduate in a week with my bachelors in civil engineering and I already have had a full time job lined up for a month that I start as soon as I finish finals. You have to pick something that there is a market for, in my area there are a shortage of civil engineers, so almost everyone in my graduating class has job offers and we haven't technically graduated yet.
Bluepies 24
Did you bullshit last week? Did you TRY to bullshit last week?