Today, while waiting for my grandmother at the train station, a girl walked out and climbed into my car. When I cleared my throat to tell her of her mistake, she screamed and ran out as if I was a criminal trying to abduct her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was waiting for a friend to pick me up. It was after dark and I was nervous, so when he pulled up I immediately jumped in the car. The young girl in the driver's seat started freaking out, screaming and punching me in the face repeatedly. I'd accidentally gotten in the wrong car. FML
Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML
Today, being the nice grandchild that I am, I went to visit my grandmother. She didn't recognise who I was. I thought she was joking. She later called the police as, "Some weirdo had walked into her house." I'm that weirdo; she wasn't joking. FML
Today, I got a call from my grandmother saying she locked her keys in the car and I needed to bring her the spares. After an hour bus ride, involving me missing my stop and getting temporarily lost, I arrived and handed her the keys. I brought the wrong ones. FML
Today, I was going into a store and saw a woman roughly handling a screaming toddler. I kept walking, until I heard the kid scream, "Help! You’re not my mommy!” I called 911 and stood behind the car to keep her from taking off. The cops arrived to see me fending off blows from a very pissed off grandma. FML
Today, I was rear-ended by a girl barely out of her teens. I got out of my car and went to get her insurance details, only for her mother to get out and up in my face, screaming at me to, "Get back in your fucking car and get the fuck out of here!" I panicked and did just that. FML
Today, I was with my grandma in my new car. She suddenly says, "I've got to pee bad." Without giving me enough time to find a gas station, she blurts out, "Never mind, I just did." FML
Today, I went to pay my grandma a visit. She called the cops because she didn't recognize me and thought I was a robber. FML
Today, I saw a little old lady trying to cross the street. I went over and tried to help her. Turned out she was actually just a really short young woman. As soon as I took her arm, she screamed in front of everyone and accused me of trying to molest her. FML
Today, I drove over an hour to my grandma's house for her birthday party. When she answered the door, her eyes went wide and she said angrily "No, not you!" and slammed the door shut in my face. FML
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Top comments
asoptavlo14 6
Bitches be crazy.
Hollywoodgirl79 18
I hope the cops didn't show up. Sorry, man.
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Comments (136)
Jessic1 5
Do you look like you an abductor?!?!?!?!?
linkinpark98 24
Don't lie. That was the highlight of your day.
l0v3p4in 7
That would definitely warrant a police arrest, especially if you had some bystanders witnessing the whole thing. I can just see OP's Grandma come up out of nowhere and beat him with her 50 lb purse screaming, "You let her go, you creep!" Then later she telling him, "Oh, I didn't even recognize you. Last time I saw you, you had hair. Where'd it go?"
linkinpark98 24
Meanwhile in Israel....
linkinpark98 24
*What *Crazy
Calyx_fml 22
That's more her fml than yours.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Getting accused of being a criminal (possibly a kidnapper and/or a pedophile if the authorities listen to the kid) by some girl where there might be a possibility for the judicial system to be in favor for the girl is a bigger FML for OP.
xStaciexLynnx 15
She didn't actually report him to the police or anything. She just ran away screaming. I think it's both their fml's.
perdix 31
Almost a perfect plan! If only you had invested in a few cough drops, you could have had a nice girlfriend to keep in your basement.
linkinpark98 24
Riiiiiiiicolaaaa!!
wtbk1 3
Lmao that's hilarious! I laughed so hard when I read that
alicecooperfan 18
I'm would be funny to see this girls FML, I'm sure it would be humorous to read :p
theretartedone 5
It was actually this grandma trolling him LOL