Today, I was riding the train home, and I sat in the row in front of a homeless woman. I noticed an old man staring at me. I got off the train after a long 6 stops, and the old man who had been staring at me walks up to me and say,s "The lady behind you was flicking lice onto you the whole time." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML
Today, I was sitting in a train when the old lady sitting next to me started staring at me. I asked her if she was OK, and she exclaimed, "Willy! It's you! Where have you been all this time?" The entire train trip went like this. FML
Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML
Today, on the train, I was sitting next to a homeless man. As we left the train he shook my hand and was seemingly on his way. That was until he caught me greeting my boyfriend, to which he decided to tell the romantic story of how he murdered a man for "getting too close to his woman." FML
Today, on the train, a man kept grabbing my crotch. When I told him to stop, I got yelled at for harassing an elderly man. FML
Today, I took the subway. The man sitting across from me would not stop staring at my breasts, so when the train came to my stop, I said, "Nothing to see now, asshole." Then I noticed his white walking stick as he got up to get off. He was blind. FML
Today, I said thanks to a man who got up for me in the bus. He angrily said "no, not you!". The old lady who sat down is now staring at me. FML
Today, I was on the train next to an elderly woman. When I told her it was my stop, she turned her knees towards the aisle, and I, thinking that she was letting me go by, began to edge past. She screamed, "DON'T PUSH ME!" and the whole train turned to look. I was thus the asshole pushing the old lady. FML
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Top comments
MagneticGuitar 0
:O Oh my, he should have told you earlier . Last! >_>
popoman 0
I would have socked him in the face because he didn't tell me earlier. Actually, in real life, I wouldn't do that. I would just mention it to him angrily. But because I'm on the internet, I can pretend to be a big, tough guy who would kick someone's ass for stepping on my sneakers.
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Comments (83)
adantecarter 0
the man didn't tell you that because i saved the awkwardness of confronting the lady. say you'd confronted her and you had a 15 minute bus ride left? AWKWARD!! lol fyl
popoman 0
Um, at least you would have fewer lice in your hair. I think that most people would feel comfortable confronting the lady and tell her to stop ******* being an inconsiderate, dirty crackwhore with lice in her ******.
Venumsucker 0
#50 hahahahahahahaha thats what evrione was thinkin lol
8trickster8 0
High-fives all round!
J_Rodriguez112 0
thats why you NEVER sit next to homeless people on the train!
infantry831 0
g
carolthebitch 0
disgusting
doorbellgirl 0
**** YOUR LIFE I AMSO SORRY FOR WAT THAT LADY DID ITS SUPER GROSS
Dopehead666 21
Maybe he didn't mention it sooner because he was worried she'd do it to him as well? Your life does indeed suck. All I know is, had someone told me a homeless woman was flicking lice onto me... I don't think she'd ever be able to do it again. ****. My nine year old niece had a huge problem with lice earlier this year... luckly I never got it. We had to cut her hair off! It was that bad. No matter how many times we treated her hair... there was always more. Terrifying.
eeehhhyyy 0
I made an account on FML JUST to say, that FML made me GAG, and I feel SO sorry for you, as soon as you get home (well, you probably are already home) start combing, quick, with a decent metal nitcomb!! FYL :(
shankapotamous15 3
you should've turned around and punched her in the face XD
countrygirl0118 6
oh my God. That is the worst, most terrible thing I have ever read on this website. That is just vile. Not only should you treat the lice right away, you should call the public transport depot number and make a complaint, and insist that they take your description of the woman and they give it to all the bus drivers. That's a huge problem with public transportation; people aren't held responsible for their behavior because it's a publicly run program. Good luck OP.