Today, I decided to call the number a cute guy had scribbled onto a napkin and given to me. I was greeted by, "Hello, this is Dr. Allen's office." Surprised, because I didn't remember his name being anything close to Allen, I asked who Dr. Allen was. She's a psychologist. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I answered a call I thought was from my friend and opened with, “What do you want, fuck face?” It was actually my dentist confirming my appointment. There was a long pause before she politely repeated my name to ensure they had the right patient. FML
Today, I spoke to my crush for the first time, and after a while he asked for my number. Ecstatic, I took the first piece of paper I saw out of my purse. I wrote it down and gave it to him, but he handed it back and said, "You might need this." It was an appointment card for my therapist. FML
Today, I got a text from an unknown number that said, "Are you free tonight?" Thinking it was a friend messing around, I responded with, "Only if you're buying booze and dinner." The reply a few minutes later was, "This is Dr. Peters, your dentist. You missed your appointment today. You need to reschedule." FML
Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said, "It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML
Today, I met an important figure in my line of work who also happens to know my dad, Alan. Upon meeting said person, I let my social anxiety get the best of me and I greeted him by saying, "Hi! I'm your Alan!" FML
Today, I met a really cute guy at work. He asked for my number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. After looking at the paper, he crumpled it up, yelled "Do you think I'm stupid? I know the rejection hotline when I see it", and walked away. It was my real phone number. FML
Today, a cute guy came up to me and asked for my phone number. I was super excited and began to write it down when he said, "It doesn't have to be your real number, I'm not gonna call anyway." I still gave him my real number. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, while working as a cashier, a really cute guy came up and said, "Hi Morgan". I freaked out and asked him how he knew my name. He then replied, "You have a name tag". FML
Today, I realized that I accidentally said my phone number wrong when I was giving it to a really smart, cute guy with all the same interests as me that I met at a bar last night. I'd had a few drinks and had gotten the middle three digits mixed up. FML
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Top comments
heresIsaac 4
if he knew a PHSYCHOLOGISTS number off the top of his head that tells you sumthin
michaelmca65 0
:) nice
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Comments (123)
sourgirl101 29
Haha, he thinks you're a nut case.
heresIsaac 4
if he knew a PHSYCHOLOGISTS number off the top of his head that tells you sumthin
munecatriste 0
either he's a total dick or you seriously need help for a random guy to give you that...
anthaz_fml 0
hehe that's awesome. maybe he thinks you need help
buttFock 0
OP you wouldn't know what a cute guy was if he came up behind you and buttfucked you infront of your grandma!!
cycle227 3
Today, a beautiful girl seemed to be interested in me at a restaurant, so I finally gave her my number. On the way home I realized that I again switched two digits, because I wasn't sure what my new number was. I made a search and that number belongs to a female psychologist. Now the girl thinks I'm an asshole. FML
rachelwhaatt 0
oh my god. that sucks. i feel for you. FYL for sure.
dberri05 2
this seems better than giving someone the number for the rejection hotline!
Jessi_the_sexii 0
that's a good one lol
xoemmily 0
lol next time yu see hm give him at&t 's number