Today, I saw my dad's friend across the street working on my neighbor's roof. To continue the airsoft war we'd been having, I shot at him with the sniper gun I'd bought. I hit him, and he fell off the roof. I ran over to see if he was OK. It wasn't my dad's friend. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I saw a gun on my dad's bedside table. I knew it wasn't real, so I picked it up and posed like a badass. Then I shot a hole in their bedroom TV, blew out my eardrums, and my mom flew in and started screaming at me. FML
Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML
Today, I went shooting with my dad and he brought his grandfather's rifle with him. I’ve never shot it before and he told me to be careful with it. The bullet exploded, ruptured the barrel, cut my face, and made me deaf in one ear. Dad still blamed me for “not shooting it properly.” FML
Today, while on the roof of my friend's house, I took a shortcut down by jumping onto the roof of his nearby shed. Not only did I go right through it and hurt my arm, I've also received several calls from my friend's dad, demanding I pay for the damage. FML
Today, I was showing my friend's dad an airsoft gun I was hoping he would be interested in buying. It's a pistol worth about 90 bucks. In the midst of showing him, I thought it would be funny to do a fake, upwards "pistol whip". The mag ended up flying out full speed and hitting him in the eye. FML
Today, my dad decided to test if Nerf guns actually hurt by sneaking up on me and shooting me with one. He missed; however, when he shot at me again, he hit my cat on my lap, causing my poor cat to run away. After desperately trying to apologize to my cat, he then shot at me a THIRD time, nailing me in the balls. FML
Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML
Today, I was at my friend's house. We were looking at her dad's guns, and I was explaining gun safety and how you should never put your finger on the trigger. I then shot a hole in the floor of her house. FML
Today, I came home from work to find that my neighbor's trash bins were still on the curb. While returning the bins to her backyard, her kid ran out and shot me with a paintball gun. Multiple times. He thought I was a burglar and ruined my new suit. FML
Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
hobozrule 4
y would u shoot him while he was on the roof
BoldfaceMatteo 0
what is a sniper gun you mean sniper rifle and you are just retarded to shoot anyone on a roof
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (210)
AwesumIndianGurl 0
Uh Excuse Me. Do I look like I belong in a cell?No, Wait. Don't answer that.
pandabeargirl89 0
We don't have to answer it, you probably will.
Dennisse_47 17
hahaha!! win^ XD
KristinaKreme 0
I bet he's going to sue your dumb ass. YDI for being uncautious and an idiot. ;/
nbk1405 0
omw you Americans wanna turn every little thing into a law suite. I say well ******* done. great shot. bad luck on the miss acquisition of target but GG OP!
Jackmangold 0
now ah can dun live like dem fancy lawyer folk
Dennisse_47 17
hahaha Boners, you're ****** hilarious. XD
xgetxbentx 13
....the guy fell off a roof, op deserves to be sued if the person was injured. it's not like op just tied someones shoelaces together and he tripped. op shot him with an airsoft gun, which hurts on it's own, and also caused him to fall off a roof which could have broken a limb, patalyzed, or even killed this guy. yeah, lots of Americans are pretty quick to sue, but whoever op shot definitely has every reason to.
Johnnnyyy 0
always have pid on ur targets homie
yashr123 0
hahaha and then when he bent down to check if the guys okay his friends dad shoots him in the ass for the win!!
Lalala1996 0
Look who's getting sued!
Katie_the_Great 6
not me! lol
stevenmx86 8
How about getting a brain you moron...
xnrdyAWSMx 0
I guess all is fair in love and war.
gammielikeoh 0
great job. next time I will be on the lookout while I'm on a roof. I'll just make sure I don't look like anyone who someone would know first.
eli_weli 0
Why would you ever think this is ok? Mental case.