Today, my boyfriend found some noise-canceling headphones that he forgot he had. Once he adjusted them and put them on, he sat down and asked me to tell him about my day. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML
Today, I bought noise-canceling headphones because my neighbors are loud. The first night I wore them, I completely missed the sound of my smoke alarm battery dying. Instead of hearing a faint beep every minute, I woke up to six missed calls from my roommate asking why I wasn't answering. FML
Today, my best friend called me to cancel our mall plans. I could hear that she was watching a movie in the background. I then called my boyfriend to see if he was busy, and I could hear the same movie in the background. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were watching TV, I asked him if he loved me. He turned up the volume. FML
Today, after 7 hours on my feet at work, my boyfriend picked me up. Relieved, I took off my shoes. Suddenly, he looked up and sniffed, asking, "Is that your feet?" I'd forgotten to put on socks in my rush to work. He made me put my shoes back on and sit in the back, windows open. FML
Today, I wore noise-canceling headphones while cleaning my apartment. Apparently I'd been singing at the top of my lungs for nearly an hour, because my neighbor knocked on my door just to ask if everything was OK. FML
Today, I walked into my office, rocking my new noise-canceling headphones. Turns out, they work so well that I didn’t hear my coworker trying to warn me about the wet floor. Now I’m the proud owner of a bruised hip and a security camera video making the rounds on our Slack channels. FML
Today, my man complained about having to listen to my "emotional problems for hours." Yeah, we did talk for two hours, 90% of which was him asking for my advice on which new mattress to buy for his bed. FML
Today, I bought noise-cancelling headphones to help me focus while working from home. They're amazing. I can no longer hear my timer, my doorbell, or my smoke alarm when I burn my lunch. FML
Today, my boyfriend accidentally called me from his pocket. I thought it would be funny to see what him and his friends were talking about. I laughed when I heard him talking about us fooling around until I realized it wasn't me. FML
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Top comments
JasonThorn 23
Use ALLLLL the hand gestures.
Lobby_Bee 18
If he insists on using them, record how your whole day went and play it back to him.
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Comments (10)
JasonThorn 23
Use ALLLLL the hand gestures.
Lobby_Bee 18
If he insists on using them, record how your whole day went and play it back to him.
Glowworm56 27
Ha ha! regardless, that's pretty classic.
RichardPencil 32
Just make sure what you say is mostly signal with minimal noise. If those headphones really worked that way, I’d always wear them.
breyes016 11
use some paper and a pencil
RichardPencil 32
You should send him a relationship-cancelling text. Get one from Bose. They’re kind of expensive, but the quality is worth it!
mt21mt 15
Have you considered that maybe you talk too much about nothing?
Tim Carver 9
they don't block out voices... the waves can't be matched to block out
queenwolfblood 8
lmao
J15237 25
I hope that you got him back for that by flipping him off, denying sex or something, but you have to admit that is some funny shit.