Today, my girlfriend was sick for the fourth day in a row. I stopped by her house to check on her and bring some necessities, only to find her ex's truck in the driveway, and the sounds of some very intense love making coming from inside. I guess she's not that sick after all. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend took a day off from work because he felt "sick". I thought he might come see me since he hadn't come over in a while. Nope, he went to hang out with his ex instead. FML
Today, I went to the hospital due to extreme sickness. My boyfriend saw this as an opportune time to take another girl out since I was "otherwise preoccupied." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. Her phone rang, and she stopped to answer it. It was her ex-boyfriend, calling her from jail. She talked to him for 15 minutes. To top it all off, before she hung up, I heard her tell him she loved him, and couldn't wait for him to get out. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot in the bedroom. Her phone rang and she stopped to have an hour long conversation with her ex. FML
Today, I rushed home because my wife called to let me know she was feeling horny for the first time after getting over a bad flu. I walked in the door and surprise surprise, her sister had called round, wanting sympathy after her latest fuckbuddy dumped her. Romantic mood ruined. FML
Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML
Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML
Today, I heard my ex, the woman I am still in love with and want to get back together with, say she had sex with her boyfriend this morning. It affected me so bad, I started getting physically ill. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to her ex-boyfriend's apartment for her to exchange his spare car keys for some of her grandmother's items. I waited outside in the parking lot for an hour, with no idea which door was his. She came out no longer a virgin. FML
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Top comments
GumStickExtraGmail 22
well, you seem like a great boyfriend, bringing her things. dont worry, you'll find someone better than her
MrBiggggg 7
Son it's okay I've had it worse. Ex gf was with two of my so called friends. Worst day ever lad. You'll find the one soon she isn't worth a second of your time
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Comments (32)
ohsnapword 21
Dude, you totally should have dug your key into the side of his pretty little, souped up, four wheel drive. IN all seriousness, she is sick...sick in the head.
davecross 11
Let the air out of all four of his tires
acmariner99 25
Scratch the paint, ding the windshield
davecross 11
Scratch what I said about letting the air out of the tires. I just googled it and that is against the law. I thought letting the air out be an inconvenience as no harm would be done to the truck and I don't want the poster to break the law.
cornyrob 33
Nonsense! She was groaning in pain!
bigtwobah 6
Well, the s and d are next to each other on the keyboard. Maybe she tried to say 'Ive been feeling dick for the last four days.'
Aaron Coen 4
life sucks so I guess she does too.. get a DOG. least they faithful
TheonecalledX 5
If she is not sick she will be. She might catch something like monosyphilaids
onceuponatime456 16
Get rid of the lying *****!
wmayrhofer 18
You need a bigger truck!
KingAdrock 16
I'm surprised OP didn't introduce the ex's truck to the business end of a tire iron.