Today, I took a nap. My boyfriend took this opportunity to go over to his "beautiful" and "amazing" ex-girlfriend's house to help her clean out her pool. I told him I didn't think that was appropriate. He told me I don't value relationships and didn't come home tonight. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend took a day off from work because he felt "sick". I thought he might come see me since he hadn't come over in a while. Nope, he went to hang out with his ex instead. FML
Today, I went home with the guy I’ve been casually seeing. His place was a disgusting pigsty so I made an excuse to leave. Later he texted me, ending things. Online I saw him bitching about how no one can pass his “girlfriend test” and that a real woman would happily clean for her man. FML
Today, I came home early, and my boyfriend's car was in my driveway. Inside, he was talking to my parents. He walked right past me and left. My mother then says, "He wanted me to tell you it's over." FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
Today, I had to clean my boyfriend's puke off of our bed. Last night he ditched me to go out partying, came home, threw up, and passed out. He thinks it's only fair I clean up today because he's "not feeling well". FML
Today, I was invited to a party, but I didn't attend because my boyfriend would be disappointed with me. Instead, I spent the night with him watching movies. At the end of the night, he broke up with me because I wasn't fun enough. FML
Today, I went to spend some time with my family. Unbeknownst to me, while I was having quality time with my family, my boyfriend of a year and a half was packing up his belongings and going back to his estranged wife. FML
Today, after a short trip out of town, I came back late at night to the yard clean, the house swept and mopped, all the laundry done, and my son asleep. I was thrilled with my boyfriend, until I found him passed out, covered in spilled beer and piss. FML
Today, my girlfriend returned from a two day trip. I'd spent the time cleaning the house and working on house projects, so she wouldn't come home and be stressed. She got upset when she got home because the house was clean, and it made her feel inadequate. FML
Today, my boyfriend begged me to spend an extra night at his house. I agreed, cancelled my Uber, and arranged for my pets to be cared for, since I wasn't coming home. Five minutes later, he decided that he had to work tonight instead. Then he got angry at me for leaving. FML
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Top comments
FunnnyGirrl 19
You should reevaluate your relationship with him, OP. He sounds like he is still into his ex, calling her 'amazing & beautiful'. You should be with a guy who only refers to you in that way, not his ex!
Charles900 16
Actually, it sounds more like he doesn't value relationships, especially if he's describing his ex in those terms.
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Comments (79)
charlieoogx 7
He ditched you = you ditch him
Fmlsea 28
get rid of him !
ally8 21
Trust me her 'pool' probably has gonorrhoea and if he cleaned that shit you don't want him anymore
jezzilla 25
Kill him.
faerieonacid 26
Wait. Did the "beautiful and amazing" refer to the ex or her house? Anyway, what a jerk.
vikky538 29
When a guy is into his ex. Dump him right away.
worldclassrager 41
Maybe he should start his own pool cleaning business...just a thought
TDKopecki 16
I'm sorry OP. I agree, I don't think he should go to his ex's house.
FrostyNipz19 12
must've been a really dirty pool if he stayed the night
GirasolNegro 22
Take advantage that he didn't come home and change the locks