Today, I ordered a Pide with extra chilies. They must have understood, "Put all the chilies you have on my Pide." I now know what hellfire tastes like. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, wanting to change from the usual pizza/coca cola menu, I decide to cook. After spending 1h30 making a "beef chili with ancho, mole, and cumin" I sprinkle a bit of salt on top of it. The top came off the salt. I think it's back to pizzas for me. FML
Today, I enjoyed my favourite pizza topped with jalapeños for an extra kick. I later got to feel that kick a second time as I vomited in the middle of the night. Some came out my nose. FML
Today, as a big fan of spicy food and a huge challenge seeker, I decided to try the hottest burger I could order. Despite being warned by a waitress, I went for it. After eating a third, I had trouble breathing from the spiciness. The waitress was smirking. FML
Today I ordered an anchovy pizza without the mushroom. Instead, I got a mushroom pizza without the anchovy. Then, when I went to take it back, the store had closed. Permanently. FML
Today, I ate a bowl of my girlfriend's homemade chili. She went a little heavy on the spices, but I ate it anyway. An hour later, I can now say that if it burns going in, it will explode coming out your rear. FML
Today, after a really bad day, I just wanted to order DoorDash. When my food came, I saw my burger had tomatoes in it, despite requesting no tomatoes. I’m deathly allergic. FML
Today, I ordered a pizza with extra cheese and no tomatoes. The pizza delivery guy handed me the box, and as I opened it, I discovered that they had delivered me a pizza… with only tomatoes and no cheese. I called the pizza place to complain, but they just said, “Well, tomatoes are technically fruit, so it’s healthy.” FML
Today, I'm so broke after paying my bills, that I resorted to eating plain garlic butter from the pizzeria down the street for lunch. The worst part: to get the butter, I stormed in and angrily complained, saying they forgot to give it to me. I never even ordered a pizza. FML
Today, I received a food delivery. The bag was huge. I thought the restaurant had made a mistake and given me extra food. I checked the receipt; it said, “Special note: For our hungriest customer. Extra napkins!” They'd remembered me from last time I ordered a ton of food. FML
Today, I ordered a large stuffed crust supreme pizza for myself. When I picked it up, I asked for extra plates and napkins so the cashier wouldn't know I don't have any friends. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
What's a Pide? Sounds vaguely obscene. Somehow chilies on the Pide made me think of a burning sensation when you pee. I might actually Google this. A Pide, that is, I don't need to look up the burning sensation.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Did you know how hot they make them usually? Cause if you ordered extra chillies without knowing that, you really were asking for trouble.
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
What's a Pide? Sounds vaguely obscene. Somehow chilies on the Pide made me think of a burning sensation when you pee. I might actually Google this. A Pide, that is, I don't need to look up the burning sensation.
MidnaLink 35
For context sake, apparently a Turkish flatbread, not unlike a Pizza.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Did you know how hot they make them usually? Cause if you ordered extra chillies without knowing that, you really were asking for trouble.
Yudith 28
I Googled it, and apparently it's a Turkish semi-open calzone or half-rolled pizza.
IHaveThePower 18
Someone on Tumblr said the best way to taste hellfire is to eat something really minty and then eat a jalapeno, so you might try it for comparison.