Today, I found out my new Commanding Officer is my ex-wife's new boyfriend. We're going on a two year tour at sea in two weeks. The reason we got a divorce is that she couldn't handle being tied down with someone in the Navy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after I was on deployment 6000 miles away, and because my wife was struggling pretty bad with work, kids, and taking care of everything on her own, she finally had a breakdown so I came home early to help. I found out she was fucking another Navy dude the whole time. I should've stayed out there. FML
Today, I'm seven months into a twelve month deployment. I called my fiancée, and she dumped me. The worst part is that two days ago, I re-enlisted to go to a unit an hour away from her house. FML
Today, I'm in my fourth month of training in the US Navy. I'm 3000 miles from home. I joined to give my wife a better life. Since I've been gone, she decided that she liked being single. FML
Today, I came home from a one-year Army deployment, only for my wife to tell me she feels claustrophobic with me in the bed. She then asked for a divorce. FML
Today, I found out after 6 months in basic training that my wife of 3 years was playing the long game to scam me. She took me for 25k while I was away, then left me for a homeless meth head. I've been "getting divorced" now longer than we had been happily married. FML
Today, aside from clearing out my bank accounts and having an affair, the kicker was finding out my fiancé planned on taking himself and his mistress to Cancun for his birthday, while I would be attending the Marine Corps boot camp. FML
Today, I found out that my most amazing spring break ever, will be spent stuck on a ship with my ex. It's been almost two years, and he still isn't over me. Yay. This cruise shall be fun. FML
Today, I met the girl who dumped me because the distance between us was too great. We're in the same city again. She's now dating a Marine in Iraq. FML
Today, I found out my fiancé is in a long distance relationship with his ex. Not only do we live on the same island, he's also my neighbor and my co-worker. FML
Today, I found out that the coworker I refused to leave my wife for is now happily married with someone else, while I'm now divorced. FML
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Top comments
baseballlegitly0 2
whata bitch
The_Weirdo 10
coincidence? I think not!
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Comments (103)
reedyii 1
she can for O-5 pay!
4Lonely2Stoner0 0
Well then she's probably going to cheat on him, so don't feel bad.
mamamenee 0
Obviously that was not the real reason she wanted a divorce.., she's a bitch you can do a lot better.
WhiteBoyThatCan 0
boners, you are my favorite person ever...
ginger0321 4
**** that bitch bro
semchuk 6
let a terrorist blow her ass up and keep saving our asses.
wrigglezeus 0
you can take the woman out of the navy but can't take a navyman out of the woman ;)
tommyc17 0
a true definition of Irony !!!!!!
kitkat98_fml 0
well than that bitch was lying. You deserve better!
madi1999 0
Don't talk about her to him. He might beat you and make your life hell.