Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sneezed while I was throwing up into the toilet. It turns out that throwing up is even less pleasant when the puke violently shoots out through your nose. FML
Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML
Today, while examining my busted nose in the mirror, I had a sneeze attack. Now it looks like someone got their throat slashed in my bathroom. FML
Today, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head against the wall. FML
Today, I strained so hard while on the toilet that I gave myself a nosebleed. FML
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
Today, I had a sneezing fit in the middle of the night, like 10 really great big sneezes, but then it was over and I went back to sleep. I got up this morning and turned the light on, and turns out I’d been sneezing blood over everything, the bed, walls, carpet, furniture, clothes, everything. FML
Today, I went on a 7-hour plane flight. For 3 hours I had a bloody nose. When it finally stopped, I sneezed. It started to bleed again. FML
Today, after days of nasal congestion, I stifled a sneeze. It went out my nose, blowing out a massive spray of green gunk, streaked with blood. This happened at a meeting, splattering the table in front of me with green bloody mucus. The other attendees looked horrified and one ran to vomit. FML
Today, I woke up with a sore throat and a stuffy nose. As my boss is an asshat who hates allowing sick leave, I thought I could power through it, but halfway through my workday I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. I had to go home early and now I can't move without pain. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
my2centsworth 15
Are you sure it's just a cold? Colds don't generally cause vomiting.
firstdbzmaker 15
haha wow I would cry if my luck was this bad...FYL
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (58)
FYLDeep 26
You hit your nose sneezing? and it was enough to knock you out? and you had already been vomiting? Sounds like you were drunk.
rottentomatoes 7
bleuark, *smack* oh fu-bleuarkk
bloobelly 0
sorry. but that wouldve been HILARIOUS to see!!
gkflower 0
haha that sucks!
Nutz321 0
yeah, that's the general idea of an FML submission.
Lolzords 11
At least you didn't vom again while you were passed out.
jjrebel26 0
ydi for throwing up as you are taking a dump
coco_MOO 0
hahaha ahwww! fyl op. ydi it for being sick.
JXJ_fml 0
Falcon punch!!? By the nose Whoa!!!
mintcar 10
That blows.
CovertMilitance 0
how did you know it was a few minutes?