Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked, I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my worst fears were realized as an insect pinged off the back of my mouth while I was singing along to the radio on my motorcycle. FML
Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML
Today, I walked down the aisle when a bug flew into my mouth. In a response, I threw up on my beautiful white wedding dress. I had to party and be in the pictures in someones spare pink dress for the rest of the day. FML
Today, while driving and singing, I noticed a large fly inside my car. I stopped singing so it wouldn't fly into my mouth. That didn't stop it from flying up my nose, causing me to swerve and drive into a ditch. FML
Today, I was talking to my grandpa while he was gardening outside. Suddenly I feel this hard, salty thing fly into my mouth and I spit it out. It turned out to be a beetle. My grandpa takes one look at the beetle and says, "Well, at least that poor bug finally got you to shut up." FML
Today, I woke up to a huge, disgusting bug next to my bed. As I tried to squish it, it suddenly flew off at high speed. Now I'm lying in bed, awake and terrified because I can hear it buzzing around but can't see it anywhere. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right inside my mouth. My tongue got stung. FML
Today, I was sitting under a rather large house plant in my dining room, minding my own business when a spider lowered itself right in front of my face. It startled me, causing me to gasp, which resulted in me inhaling the spider. I then spent 3 minutes choking on it. FML
Today, while I was eating, my younger sister came over and sat beside me. She started clipping her toenails. Disgusted by it, I turned and opened my mouth to tell her to move somewhere else, just as one flew inside my mouth. FML
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Top comments
Doberman101 29
I couldn't help but giggle at this FML, but I'm sorry your sister doesn't have a taste for your voice. I'm sure you weren't that bad. As for the bug, that's kinda gross. But you would've gotten a lot of protein from it.
denden_mushi 11
If it flew into your mouth while you were singing, wouldn't that mean that the bug enjoyed it so much that it wanted to become one with your voice? I bet it didn't know that by. doing this it would result in you stopping and its death. FML for the bug. :(
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Comments (42)
Omniprism 15
Just smile and wave.
LegionRapier61 8
That's amazing! You should congratulate your sister on what could possibly be the best burn I've encountered today. Bravo!
messymessiah 11
Ha ha ha face it. That was a funny call by your sister. I can see any of my friends or family saying that
mariathehoe 15
When I was 6 I was out camping with my family and when we got there I wanted to appreciate nature and I took a deep breathe and a fly went up my nostril..
tiredofwaiting 25
Your sister is funny.
greengreengreen 13
That's hilarious, love her humor
lRain 6
It sucks that a bug flew in your mouth but your sister is hilarious. It is indeed quite funny :)
JoyAda 11
Your sister is my new hero. ******* hilarious.
BrightBlue87 9
That's just all around awesome!
TheLostCauseFML 40
Your sister is hilarious.