Today, my girlfriend introduced me to her best male friend, a creepy "Nice Guy" type. When she went to the bathroom, he came closer to me and said, "She thinks she likes you, but I'm destined to be with her, I saw it in the stars. Nobody can love her like me." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my boyfriend's best friend. She was a girl he's known for years, and I respected that. She was sweet, until my boyfriend went to the bathroom and she threatened to stab me if I don't leave him. He doesn't believe me, and accused me of having serious jealousy issues. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend was crushing on his best friend. When I found out, I asked him about it. He replied, "Don't worry, she's perfect and is way too good for me." FML
Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML
Today, I was at a friend's house; she left the room for a few minutes. Her dad then put me in a headlock and told me that I'd, "better treat his daughter right if I ever wanted to walk again," because she's in love with me. I'm a gay guy, and she knows. FML
Today, I found out that one of my best friends likes the girl that I like. What's funny is that my best friend is also a girl, and has a better chance with her than I do. FML
Today, a guy who I was low-key crushing on asked me out. I excitedly told my best friend, as I do when I have big news. She informed me that the same guy asked her out 15 minutes ago. He'd originally been into her and only came to me because she rejected him. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to a female friend of mine, because I thought they would get along. Apparently they get along better than I expected; she dumped me for the other girl. FML
Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML
Today, the girl I thought I was dating introduced me to her boyfriend. We've gone on dates and have slept in the same bed, but it turns out she thought I was her gay best friend and was planning to introduce me to her boyfriend's brother. FML
Today, I introduced the girl I was talking to my best friend, and we all hung out. Until this day, her and I were doing great. After my friend left, she started gushing about how hot he is. He wasn't hitting on her at all. I reminded her that, and that he has a girlfriend. She was calm, but visibly upset. FML
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Top comments
FluffythePink 23
Ouch. Wait until he tries something else and just record him. She's not going to believe her 'best friend' is a psychopath without clear evidence. Get that and you'll be rid of him. He'll probably try scaring you off every time her back is turned so you'll have plenty of opportunity. If she decides to keep him after seeing the evidence then run, dude, run...
Chazzster 32
It’s not creepy to be a nice guy or a friend. But it’s very creepy to pretend to be that in order to try to get into a sexual relationship with someone… I agree that the best thing to do is to record Mr Creepy’s comments if you can and play them back for GF. If that’s not possible you can at least tell her what he said - That ought to open her eyes so she can see for herself if he seems a bit off. Frankly it seems odd that Creepy would actually tell you what he did when keeping his mouth shut would have likely allowed him more latitude in his plan. I guess he watched too many James Bond villains.
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Comments (3)
FluffythePink 23
Ouch. Wait until he tries something else and just record him. She's not going to believe her 'best friend' is a psychopath without clear evidence. Get that and you'll be rid of him. He'll probably try scaring you off every time her back is turned so you'll have plenty of opportunity. If she decides to keep him after seeing the evidence then run, dude, run...
Chazzster 32
It’s not creepy to be a nice guy or a friend. But it’s very creepy to pretend to be that in order to try to get into a sexual relationship with someone… I agree that the best thing to do is to record Mr Creepy’s comments if you can and play them back for GF. If that’s not possible you can at least tell her what he said - That ought to open her eyes so she can see for herself if he seems a bit off. Frankly it seems odd that Creepy would actually tell you what he did when keeping his mouth shut would have likely allowed him more latitude in his plan. I guess he watched too many James Bond villains.
Brightside86 31
Reality is going to dropkick that guy in the face. The chances of a girl suddenly realizing that her friend is "the one" is basically nil.