Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked to my boyfriend's house, which takes literally 2 minutes since we are also neighbours. He wanted sex straight away. The walk took longer than the sex, by over a full minute. FML
Today, I got off late from my bartending job, which is close to my house, but my boyfriend begged me to come to his place half an hour away. I decided the sex would be worth the drive. He was sound asleep. FML
Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML
Today, I got a text from a guy I hooked up with. I'm not really interested in him, so I rushed out of his house last night. He was letting me know I left my wallet at his house, and if I want it, I'll have to let him take me to dinner. FML
Today, I had sex with this guy I had been crushing on for five years. It took longer to put my clothes back on than he lasted. FML
Today, I drove over 3 hours to hook up with a guy I've been talking to for a couple of months. When we start having sex, he lasted less than a minute, and then couldn't get it up again afterwards. I slept uncomfortably the entire night on his twin bed while he snored. FML
Today, I got a phone call from my cheating ex, asking if I would go out with him tonight. After 3 years of no contact, I decided to give him another chance and gave him my address for his GPS. I was then told that I lived too far and he didn't want to drive. He cancelled. I live 15 minutes away. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, I went home with my cute coworker. What started out as a little dirty talk and teasing ended with him admitting he was in a terrible emotional place, then sending me home in an Uber so he could sleep. FML
Today, things heated up with the new guy I've been seeing for a couple of weeks, he kept saying things like "I want you so bad" and "it's going to take hours" to the point that I was so hot, I decided to go for it. Apparently he has "a problem sometimes" getting it up. FML
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Top comments
tyrob911 0
let's get this straight here. he texted her wanting to hook up. if you really understand that text, you'll know that the guy didn't care about pleasing her. all he wanted to do was nut and he did. he could care less how long it took him. his mission was accomplished.
summerloolooloo 0
I heard that there are new kinds of condoms which have some sort of a numbing cream on them. How about giving those a shot? HAHA.
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Comments (60)
rlet 1
obviously he fail to tell you it was for a quicky LOL
insidejokeswithm 0
*Failed
ragsy 7
That's really common the first time you hook up due to the excitement and anticipation. Next time it will last longer.
ragsy 7
PS--look at the bright side. At least he didn't use a sock as a condom.
TheRipper_fml 0
#1, you're a piece of shit. OP, YDI for being a filthy little ***** that drove over to **** a guy who made the request via text. If I were him I'd text you again, but this time I'd see exactly how quickly I could finish just for the **** of it. Why not? It's not like I would have to put a lot of effort into getting you to let me.
irishwhiskey91 0
damn, can't even hold his load for 5 min. FYL
awesome_o 0
**** everyone's life on here for getting on her case for enjoying nsa sex. your pussy isnt holy or special. the same way men enjoy the act of sex, women do as well. if that's all you're interested in with someone, why should they be wined and dined for anonymous approval? it's obvious this site is full of virgins who watch teen romances. stfu and get laid already.
adrianlives702 0
shut the **** up pussy
aeiouxuoiea 0
LOL @ 29. yeah. How experienced is this guy? If he 1. hasn't had sex in a while, 2. doesn't **********, often or at all, 3. wasn't trying to last long to please you, then he wouldn't last long at all. Give him a break. But yeah, that does suck.
wtf20007 10
haha @ 26 ROFL!
dman5 0
hahahahahahahahahah. that sucks