Today, I was really hungry at work, and my stomach growled loudly. One of my co-workers heard it and thought it was a cat. Ashamed, I played dumb and we ended up spending twenty minutes looking for a cat that I knew didn't exist. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and a few coworkers when my stomach started growling. It was nearly lunchtime and I guess I was hungry. I tried to play it off like it was just a passing rumble, but it wouldn't stop. Eventually, my boss asked if I needed to use the restroom. FML
Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML
Today, as I returned from work, a cat was meowing at me in a bush. I said hi to it and walked inside. Then I noticed one of my cats was nowhere to be found. After a bit of panicking, I finally figured out that cat in the bush was MY cat, and he was meowing because he was stuck. I don't know how he got outside. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML
Today, I was in an elevator with a coworker I barely know. My stomach thought that it was time to remind me I hadn’t eaten breakfast. It growled like a dying whale, and my coworker gave me a concerned look. To make it worse, the elevator got stuck for five minutes. We stood in awkward silence, with my stomach making noises the whole time. FML
Today, I was in a Teams call with my work team, and I was getting really annoyed at a woman in the team just waffling on about nothing, I yelled, "Just shut up you fat pig, shut up!", not knowing my mic was unmuted, I had to lie, saying I was yelling at my dog for barking. Not sure anyone believed me. FML
Today, I went to a job interview, and halfway through my perfectly rehearsed answers, my stomach started growling loudly. I tried to keep calm, but then it let out the most embarrassing noise I’ve ever heard. The interviewer paused what he was saying, then said, "Are you hungry or do you need to fart?" FML
Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML
Today, I was pretending a long corridor at work was a catwalk, when a coworker walked out just in time to see me prancing around like an idiot. Now the whole building is laughing about it. FML
Today, I had an upset stomach all day at work. When lunch break came, I rushed to the bathroom. Just as I turned into an unstoppable human whoopie cushion, a co-worker walked in. He heard the entire arse symphony, and just asked, "What the fuck, dude?!" as he left. FML
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Top comments
KingLewisII 34
I hope you'll just be more honest from meow on.
SmokinGuns 13
I don't see why you'd be embarrassed about your stomach growling. You're only human afterall.
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Comments (63)
Cass_x 22
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I don't blame you. At all. Things like that happen
Sandsh8rk 36
Really? Can you say that at one point in your life you spent 20 minutes looking for a non-existant cat?
Cass_x 22
I didn't mean the cat part. I meant the part about being ashamed of the sound your stomach makes when you're hungry.
askullnamedbilly 33
Nope, I blame her. If you're that ashamed of your bodily functions, you deserve to waste 20 minutes of your life. Everybody gets hungry, everybody's stomach makes noises sometimes. Why on earth would you get involved in such a stupid cover-up?
garrett_8614 14
#28, seems a little harsh. I'm sure OP isn't the only person to be ashamed of something like this in a quiet setting, it could be embarrassing for anyone. I know it's happened to me in a quiet lecture hall before and it was pretty embarrassing
DrummerWS 23
Through all this I'm just thinkin they got a 20 min break from work....
countryrose92 23
True, they got a 20 minute break from work, but op shouldn't be ashamed of being hungry. They should of just said "no, no cat, I'm just super hungry" pretty simple, and not a waste of time.
TheAbstract 15
I mean hey, OP committed to that story. kudos.
ladyLALAA 29
If I were OP I would have said it was me because that's an extra 20 minutes of being hungry!
brenton490 19
My coworker did something similar to this. But he was making cat noises, and a kid ask if there was a cat in the bathroom. So they went looking for it, and he told the kid it went through the wall. The kid ended up telling his mom what happen... Pretty sure he is going to end up with a restraining order.
B1ackthesun 31
Restraining order #83? Sounds like they probably belong on a sex offenders list to me. Maybe I'm over reacting, but that story made me very uneasy.
ohmandapants 17
^ the two of you need to take a seat. He should have his life ruined and be labelled as a sex offender because he played a prank on a child? Ookay then. That's not an overreaction at all.
brenton490 19
I guess you guys totally did not catch the entire story, but that's okay.
KingLewisII 34
I hope you'll just be more honest from meow on.
Sandsh8rk 36
Yeah, looking for the 'cat' was pretty much a lost claws.
Redoxx_fml 22
What a purrfect waste of 20 mins
jerryj 27
Who are you guys kitten? I see muffin wrong at all.
annunaki_fml 11
thats brilliant
Axipiter 24
Not so funny meow, is it?
imalosertho 14
I will try not to furrrget all of your helpful advice if this happens again.
euphoricness 28
Yurrr welcome, OP!
underthesea12 24
Maybe your coworker has something for you to eat
JJ_86 22
The look in co-worker's face if OP says the truth later...
ialexi13 6
you duck
Sandsh8rk 36
You fish.
nippleripple 9
you sponge!
PewDiePie_Lover 14
You horse
Rallred32 20
You anime version of pewdiepie!
enddmd 27
You digital image containing text.
Godsofdracos 15
You... Red man groupie?
TehAnderz 11
You Iphone text message.
zandalee 20
You gorgeous red truck you!!
Edumcg 24
You Armin.
Rallred32 20
Well, no coming back from that one, 80.
akell3 12
you something/someone.
MrBoredomioo 18
You whatever that pic is
jrod9327 17
@2 well played. Anyhow just be honest about it. Nothing to be embarrassed about. A matter of fact you and your coworker will have a fun story between you 2.
Sandsh8rk 36
Have you heard of the reply button before? It comes in handy sometimes.
jrod9327 17
It was a mistake on my part. Satisfied now?
akell3 12
why is your comment buried?
Ololo_fml 16
Instead of looking for it, you should have asked him to have a lunch together lol
ChenEighty 20
What I want to know is how being hungry is shameful. Everyone gets hungry, it's not even embarrassing...
meganlovestea 15
It's more the noise that's embarrassing, rather than the hunger
IllestRated 17
So the cat got your tongue?
Nish007 15
cat got her tum I rekon
SmokinGuns 13
I don't see why you'd be embarrassed about your stomach growling. You're only human afterall.
imalosertho 14
No apparently I am not. I am a cat.
Kiki242 19
You shouldn't have been ashamed about it. You were hungry.
turtles4life 24
My stomach used to growl REALLY loud when I was in school and it was so embarrassing. But now I just don't really care anymore, I just say something like, " Woah that was my stomach!" And just make a joke out of it.