holy
United Kingdom
Pissed
Today, I told my brother to piss off. He decided to do exactly that, from the balcony onto my lap. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML
Anonymous
Barnsley, United Kingdom
Unpleasant
Today, my brother tried to sit on my head and fart, except he followed through. It didn’t make it past his trousers but for a few brief seconds before he ran to the bathroom I could smell it and feel how warm it was. FML
wetbutt
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Best clapback
Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML
smells like ass
Today, my brother tried to ninja-kick his dirty underwear up into his hand. He failed and it landed on my face. FML
Anonymous
Right in the nuts
Today, I thought it would be fun and nice to pick my little brother up, but no, he accidentally kicked me in the balls. Twice. FML
smellsofeggs
United Kingdom
Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML
Anonymous
Freeloadin' freewheelin'
Today, my screw-up brother turned up at my house, expecting to move in rent free. Apparently, mom kicked him out and sent him to me. He's a freeloading demon, who's almost impossible to get rid of, so I told him to get lost and locked my door. Now my mom calls every 5 minutes to call me a selfish asshole. FML
jeeperspeepers
United States
Creepy
Today, my brother's best friend spent the night and was changing with the door partially open. He's super hot and as I was watching him change, he sneezed. Forgetting he didn't know I was watching him, I said bless you. He called me a freak, slammed the door in my face and told my parents. FML
Kutakito
Saltsj?baden, Sweden
Today, my 25 year-old brother dumped all my underwear into the fireplace for interrupting him while he was playing WoW. FML
GaveAnInchTakeAMile
United States
Today, my brother's friend was about to drive home drunk, so I convinced him to think and not be stupid. It wasn't an invitation to puke on my floor then try to crawl into bed with me. FML
Top comments
i_got_it 0
Imagine what he would've did if you said **** off.
allmidnighteyes 11
He's got good aim. You should've done the same thing. Have like, a fight via streams to see whose stream is mightier.
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Comments (90)
morgan020 0
the only thing that would make this better is if it's your little brother in which case he is waaayyyy smarter than you. your parents should be so proud at least one of their children is smart and has a sence of humor :)
joHnnycsU 0
damn that's clever
Louise362 0
all these people who are saying good on the brother who was on the balcony.. i wonder how youd feel if your brother or someone else pissed on you. definite fyl
Kitkatytidlur 0
Word to the wise: Choose your words wisely.
CFR 0
If that's the case he should be glad he didn't say "**** off"
kinkolicious 0
hahah thats priceless, your bro is a champ
alexvb10 0
hahaha!
Aerianna 0
Lol at all the people trying to be smartarses going all "lol he peed in your lap so what". I swear i'd love to see some guy randomly come over to you all and piss on your laps.
scorpiella 4
Good thing you didn't tell him to **** off.
WinRarGuy_96 0
lmfao..... so much win here..
MLSxxox 3
hahaha lol XD