Miscellaneous: Perfect contraceptive

Perfect contraceptive

By slapstick1982 - 22/11/2019 01:00

Today, I realized that my wife is on her 3rd month using an IUD. The side effect is nonstop bleeding. I haven't had sex with her since she got it. I'd say this contraceptive is working perfectly. FML

agreeclassic 2 255

vote type 1 316

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Similar FMLs

By Anonymous - 14/01/2017 08:00

Today, I have peace of mind that I am not pregnant, thanks to my IUD. It's not because of the effectiveness of the contraceptive, but my inability to touch my boyfriend. I haven't stopped bleeding since my doctor installed it 3 weeks ago. FML

agreeclassic 5 697

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I'm an empath

By S Edhouse - 13/04/2023 22:00 - New Zealand - Wellington

Today, and ever since my wife has gone onto birth control pills for her endometriosis, her time of the month now lasts for three weeks each month out of the four, and on the fourth week she gets pains and doesn't feel like sex. FML

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Oops

By maybe time to adopt - 04/03/2018 15:00

Today, after my wife and I have been trying for a baby for 2 years, I found out she's still on the pill. Apparently when she was a teen she had bad period cramps, so her doctor gave her the pill for the pain. She never realized it stops pregnancy. FML

agreeclassic 7 562

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By Anonymous - 27/06/2012 20:02 - United States - Elkhart

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I had an IUD put in two years ago that's supposed to prevent pregnancy. To put it in perspective, less than 1% of people using this IUD get pregnant. Lucky me. FML

agreeclassic 30 916

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By theflow - 15/08/2012 17:08 - Australia - Perth

Today, thanks to a new form of birth control, I've now been having my period non-stop for six weeks. FML

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Long haul

By Anonymous - 03/06/2025 17:00 - United States

Today, I’ve had an irregular period my whole life. I was on birth control and took out my IUD in January. I’ve had my period ever since. It’s going on 5 months now. FML

agreeclassic 485

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By irwingiggles - 08/02/2015 10:26 - Netherlands

Today, I figured out how my birth control works. If you're on your period for four months straight you can't have sex, so you won't be pregnant. FML

agreeclassic 37 845

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By Anonymous - 05/12/2010 01:28 - United States

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML

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Buckle up!

By Anonymous - 25/06/2024 16:00 - South Africa

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant with our third child. This wouldn't be a problem but we only want two kids and I had a vasectomy 6 weeks ago (they take 3 months to be effective). We weren't careful only one time, and since it was difficult to conceive the two we wanted, we didn't think it would be a problem. FML

agreeclassic 174

vote type 1 767

Pre-partum depression

By Luzer - 18/09/2022 00:30 - Italy

Today, it’s been four and a half months that my wife is pregnant. It’s been a long and hard process, but we made it. Now she says she hates it, she can’t stop thinking about how her life, body, and identity got ruined, and how she wishes she was dead. I'm a simple man. I was happy. FML

agreeclassic 1 454

vote type 1 292

colderthanyou 15

Friday 22 November 2019 1:04

That side effect is supposed to be temporary. She should be heading back to the doctor if it lasts longer than 3 months

TCRII 29

Friday 22 November 2019 1:04

Throw down a towel and make a crime scene.

Comments

Yolanda Patrice Evans 17

Friday 22 November 2019 15:19

“My wife has been bleeding for 3 months & I can’t get my sick wet. Fml” dude **** you and if that’s your only concern she’s probably faking the side effects because she doesn’t want to be up under a dick like you 🙃

Seeya55 31

Friday 22 November 2019 21:48

Please tell me how you fake bleeding for 3 months out your ******. Unless she stocked up well before hallowe'en.

E2dav 5

Monday 25 November 2019 11:24

She meant maybe OPs partner is just telling him she's bleeding for 3 months. I doubt he sees daily proof..

Sarah Jezierny Harmon 5

Friday 22 November 2019 15:20

“Boo boo I can’t have sex” while your wife has been bleeding constantly for three months. **** her life more like 🙄

BlankName1990 2

Friday 22 November 2019 16:19

**** YOUR life huh? you friend are a crap husband.

SquirrelRulingtheWorld 8

Saturday 23 November 2019 5:11

Boo, hoo, hoo. News flash: this sucks way, WAY more for her than it does for you.

Charity Taylor 17

Saturday 23 November 2019 7:30

Real men sail the red seas and get their red wings.

Laurea Lindroos 8

Saturday 23 November 2019 15:54

I hope she dumps your ass. Seriously, she’s constantly bleeding, probably in pain, having a foreign object up her uterus because patriarchy made it so that it’s the woman’s responsibility to use contraception - AND ALL YOU CAN THINK OF IS HOW YOU’RE NOT HAVING SEX???