Today, after my wife and I have been trying for a baby for 2 years, I found out she's still on the pill. Apparently when she was a teen she had bad period cramps, so her doctor gave her the pill for the pain. She never realized it stops pregnancy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML
Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend is on the pill, and even though my girlfriend took emergency contraception, she became pregnant days after the first time we had sex without a condom. FML
Today, I found out that after using several types of birth control, and being paranoid about pregnancy, I've been infertile for years. FML
Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
Today, I found out that I have unnecessarily been using birth control for the past 10 years. A surgery I had following a complication with my first child apparently rendered me infertile, and none of the doctors bothered to enlighten me. FML
Today, I figured out how my birth control works. If you're on your period for four months straight you can't have sex, so you won't be pregnant. FML
Today, I finally had my doctor's appointment to get my tubes tied. I've been waiting for 2 years. Instead, I found out that my birth control failed and I'm pregnant. FML
Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML
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Top comments
damo222 12
Please don't breed
Mechakitty 13
I'm really concerned that neither her parents or her school gave her the talk or explained how contraceptives work.... she's lucky she hasn't developed an STD in that time. I hope she atleast knows what a condom is....
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Comments (28)
XPiemaster 16
At least you know the pills are very effective!
Tania Jain 3
Hey Nadine / Samedi, As someone that has previously shared a Super Mario day article from our blog, I just wanted to give you a heads up about the latest post we just put together on Super Mario day: https://edgylabs.com/super-mario-day Just thought you’d get a kick out of it! We appreciate you sharing our content. Cheers, Srikanth Heerekar
SwordSlashBlade 13
If she hadn’t figured that out how capable would be of raising a child?
TheOfficialSquib 7
Your fault for marrying a retard
QueenAfrodite 8
There are tooooo many commercials about birth control pills and the such for her as an adult not to know that. Don’t be that daft please. She knew she full well knew. Your doctor even talks to you about it. Come on man. She just doesn’t want a baby lol.
Heather Speck 3
Dude your wife is stupid 🤦🏼♀️🤷♀️
wrenavery90 12
Oh please. There's just no way she wouldn't know that. I mean they're literally called birth control pills.