Today, I was sitting around a bonfire when an ember landed on my crotch. Without thinking, I quickly slapped at it and hit myself square in the nuts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was out, I was having a drink with a pretty girl. She started looking at my crotch and said, smiling, "There's something burning down there." I smiled, but she insisted. Ashes had set my trousers on fire. FML
Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were sitting on the couch and his legs were on my lap. We heard a loud firework from somewhere outside our window, we both jumped and I felt the pain of him kicking me in the nuts. FML
Today, I was making my bed and had an armload of pillows. One slipped and I tried to catch it between my arm and leg. I missed, sending my fist into my nuts. FML
Today, I was applying some Icy Hot to my sore thighs, when I accidentally got a little on my dime sacks. For the next hour, it felt like someone had lit a match under my plums. FML
Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML
Today, I woke up to someone screaming "FIRE!" When I sat up, my face went right into my room-mate's ballsack. Apparently it was funny. FML
Today, while lighting a cigar, I set my beard on fire. FML
Today, as I was watching a DVD, I noticed a spider crawling on my crotch area. So, I panicked and smashed the spider, smashing my nuts in the process. FML
Today, I found out how it feels to have my groin catch fire due to a magic trick going wrong. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
skiz_fml 0
This isnt an FYL or a YDI. Thats just ******* funny.
redbluegreen 41
Firecrotch.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (132)
taylordianex04 0
is this anthony barbano ?! (:
Hourglass_fml 0
Owned!!!
yme 0
its like the south park when Jimmy has a dream he gets a giant erection, wakes up and punches himself in the crotch
danielw 0
can someone tell me why he deserved this, please?
arty191 0
ahhh funny =)
Yawn823 0
lol classic XD
royboh 0
Better than a burn.
doof_fisch 2
Puts me in a Christmas mood: "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...."
basketballbrian 0
hahahaha funny stuff
sux_2_b_you 0
YDI for saying crotch