Today, I woke up to someone screaming "FIRE!" When I sat up, my face went right into my room-mate's ballsack. Apparently it was funny. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my flatmate woke me up early, saying there was a fire and we had to evacuate. Barely awake, she practically dragged me downstairs and got to the front door. Once we got there, she opened the front door, kneed me in the nuts, and pushed me out, locking it behind her. I was only in boxers. FML
Today, I was in minding my own business in bed in my dorm room. It was dark and my roommate came over, intending to slap my ass really hard. The problem is, I was lying face up. FML
Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML
Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shat myself. FML
Today, my sister woke me up panicking saying our kitchen was on fire, and we had to leave. She practically dragged me out of bed and all the way to the front door. When we got outside, she suddenly kneed me in the nuts and went back inside, locking the door behind her. I was only wearing boxers. FML
Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were sitting on the couch and his legs were on my lap. We heard a loud firework from somewhere outside our window, we both jumped and I felt the pain of him kicking me in the nuts. FML
Today, I was sitting around a bonfire when an ember landed on my crotch. Without thinking, I quickly slapped at it and hit myself square in the nuts. FML
Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML
Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML
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Top comments
madmikemiller 6
Kinda is
bfrench95 0
You should have yelled "BABY KILLER" then headbutt his nutsack :)
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Comments (307)
madmikemiller 6
Kinda is
xSonic 9
Kinda is necessary to bite it off!
changesinme 0
Play cool and say 'Oh how I love the smell and taste of ball sacks in the morning'
bfrench95 0
You should have yelled "BABY KILLER" then headbutt his nutsack :)
nuggetmonster 12
And thus a new competition was created: Extreme Teabagging.
Damn_Hippster 11
I was expecting a pie to the face but this is much better!
BT14 5
Wow that's gay
marinus_fml 20
Today I thought it would be funny to startle my sleeping roommate by yelling FIRE! Turns out he sat up extremely quick, whacking his face into my ballsack. They are now well bruised. FML.
smileeee_fml 0
It's just a joke. I'm sure op will laugh about it one day.
hardonforjesus 10
52 - YDI
zombicidal 11
I need to get a parachute the semi finals for the extreme teabagging competition next week
_Oblivion_ 12
wait so 17 you would rather have a guys balls in your mouth than just push him away?
Zeppelin1969 5
30- It's a whole new level of 'the game'!
reaganomics 6
Plan your revenge Op....just watch out those karma cicles can be vicious
DryHumor 4
Headbutt that ballsack. I think they'll think twice then..
JocelynKaulitz 28
"Today, I got my roommate to slam his head into my ballsack, this is probably the closest anyone has ever gotten to my balls, FML."
FUDGE99 5
Now I hope he wasn't naked.
margie2194 12
I laughed. I really did...
Dracoboxer357 36
Lmao! That is funny! Of course, if anyone's dumb enough to attack you with their tenders, you should remind them why they labeled as such! ;) CRUNCH!
WaSiSimiLang 8
FIRE! fire? Wher-mhhhnmm!... Mmmmmmmhmmmmm!
spy1729 8
serves you eight bitch
ChrisTheCalm 9
I laughed my ass off now and I'll probably laugh later too lmao
ikillhobbits 0
you just got t-bagged
Potterhead1 3
I used to do FIRE pranks, then I took an arrow to the knee.
daisyismydog 3
Always a good way to start off your morning..
So2011 4
Your room-mate has a disgusting sense of humor.
AngrehPirate 0
It's called a dick move
yohooooooo 5
this is how I wake up every morning
yohooooooo 5
this is how I wake up every morning
shutdafrontdoor 0
That is funny
mirag 0
Quite a creative prank
muzy 23
It's all fun and games... until someone gets tagged!
Monkeybuttcream 4
It's all fun and games until someone gets a dick in the eye. OP - I would start sleeping with eye protection on at night!
vegetarian982 0
At least there was no real fire :/
xcarxcrashx 9
Way to look at the bright side! :)
Zeppelin1969 5
One cheer for optimism!
LookAtMyGoat 8
Well that's a sticky situation...
gleeeeek 7
Seriously?
theunwiseone 4
#6 your balls are sticky?? You know your supposed to wash them once in awhile right?
graham11 14
6- I sure hope OP's roommate didn't cum when OP hit his ball sack. I'd feel pity for any future girlfriend..
KoolKat369 5
Apparently!?! It is!! Hahaha!! Fyl, but I'm lmfao!!!
graham11 14
OMG like totally! lmfao lolzzzz If someone ever texted me like that, I'd probably delete their number.
DeOilers 9
What a ballsy move. Are you going to get revenge?
Justin23L 2
Well, he could have easily gotten vicious and bit him...
zylandria 0
I've heard that uppercut can be brutal...
sparkrok 8
huhuhu..... ballsy move..... :)
MissMae93 23
Clearly your roommate figured your face would cure the fire in his pants.
zano74 0
Ewww.
lindon555 0
Lol