Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML
Today, my girlfriend left me. Knowing that I am a germaphobe, she took all of my cleaning supplies and spread mud and trash everywhere. FML
Today, my friend and I went back to my house after a gym session. After I took my shoes and socks off in the foyer, I told her to wait while I brought some post-workout smoothies. I came back to find her sniffing my socks. She stared back at me for a bit, said, "Uh, catch ya later", and left with my socks. FML
Today, I went to retrieve my sneakers that my wife made me leave outside the door of our hotel room. Somebody had shat in one of them. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, I went through the stuff that I'd left at my ex’s place and started unpacking it. I found a pair of another girl's panties. We broke up a little over a week ago. FML
Today, I woke up, put on my fuzzy socks, walked down my hallway, and stepped in cat vomit. I took off my now wet socks, continued walking down the hallway, and stepped barefoot in cat shit. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML
Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML
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Top comments
chudun 18
Sock her ass, she sounds like a piece of shit.
cheeology 22
how does one shit in a sock? I think you need to fight fire with fire and shit on her door step OP, add glitter for a nice touch.
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Comments (37)
niallo 23
If that's all it cost you, you did alright. You hear horror stories about some of these bad breakups. Count yourself lucky and move on. Also, change the locks so she doesn't try and do it again.
_fakebelieve 9
That shit socks!
squizzlebee 19
That's some impressive aim
dabomsht123 3
Take the shit-filled socks stick em in a brown lunch bag put em on her step and light that ****** on fire. Lol
19foxy81 8
Sounds like a shitty situation :(
Devolution 8
How did she...nvm
foreverxxi 0
Good riddance. Now what you need to do is find a pair of gloves and smear it on her car.
RichardPencil 32
You mean she filled several socks with one turd each or did she pop a squat in your sock drawer. In either case, that's excellent control.
mitch2161998 6
sounds like a shitty situation.
mermaidgirle 12
How about no
anthony99 14
Fake, everyone knows girls don't poop