Today, I made scrambled eggs. Returning the rest of the carton, I tripped and spilled 10 raw eggs all over the inside of the fridge. The same fridge I spent 2 hours cleaning and scrubbing every drawer and shelf of yesterday. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I spent almost an hour cleaning and scrubbing the inside of my fridge. Just when I'd finished putting everything back inside, I tipped over the open milk carton. FML
Today, I cracked an egg which turned out to have an extremely thin shell, so at first contact with the bowl, it came apart in my hand and the contents glooped right through my fingers, all the way down the kitchen cabinet, into a half-open drawer, as well as onto the floor and underneath the cabinet. FML
Today, I helped my neighbor carry her groceries upstairs. One egg carton slipped from my hand and exploded in the sink. She stared at the mess, then at me, and said, “That's my omelet down the drain.” FML
Today, I woke up and poured myself a large glass of orange juice from a carton and took a big gulp only to realize it was liquid eggs. FML
Today, my father started drinking a little early. At some point, he got hungry and decided to boil eggs. He started a dozen, drank some more, and passed out on the couch. When I came home, all the water had boiled off and the eggs had exploded all over the kitchen. I'm still cleaning up the mess. FML
Today, I cracked an egg with a disgusting rotten black yolk into the pan, ruining my almost done breakfast. Last time this happened, just coincidentally, two deaths in the family and a near deadly mental breakdown followed. Now eggs seem too gross to eat, and I’m afraid this time was another bad omen. FML
Today, I fell down my stairs while holding a carton of eggs I was going to use to egg my ex-boyfriend's house. Karma's definitely a bitch to me. FML
Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
Today, I was walking to my car after grocery shopping when I dropped my heavy-ass bag, which then ripped. Everything spilled out, and while I was picking it up, a kind stranger ran over to help me… by accidentally stepping on and smashing my carton of eggs. FML
Today, my house got egged and since it is the winter the eggs froze. They used two dozen eggs. FML
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Top comments
Dave_Davington 34
That is some eggceptionally bad luck.
RichardPencil 32
So you really made a dozen scrambled eggs — most of them are Rocky-style, though.
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Comments (8)
Dave_Davington 34
That is some eggceptionally bad luck.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
I'll bet the fridge appreciated that.
RichardPencil 32
So you really made a dozen scrambled eggs — most of them are Rocky-style, though.
OneGuySixDemons 23
You’ve got egg on your face A big disgrace Somebody better put you back into your place
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
You've got egg on your cakes. You big disgrace. Somebody else should have put those eggs back in their place. Singing, we will, we will mock you.
BurnInDemonFire 39
You're yolking. Looks like you'll have to shell out for some more. Though I can't imagine cleaning your fridge again went over easy, and doing all that work probably left you feeling fried, but don't worry. Omelet you in on a little secret - you can get some more eggs for just a couple bucks.
Ashaly 11
If it takes you that long to clean a fridge then there’s a different problem going on
lucasj23 11
wasnt the carton closed? it seems unlikely that all the eggs would have flown out it it was closed.