Today, my boyfriend's daughter asked me what would happen if she chose to stop urinating for two weeks. She wanted to know whether it would kill her or just start coming out of her mouth. She's 17 years-old, and was deadly serious. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my daughter to the lake. She told me she had to go to the bathroom and I whispered to her, "Just pee in the lake, it's fine, but go in a little deeper." She went in the lake and then turned to me to yell, "MOM, IS THIS DEEP ENOUGH FOR ME TO PEE?" FML
Today, I talked to a teenage girl that came in for debilitating constipation. Turns out she'd stopped drinking water and had been purposely holding her bowels because her new online boyfriend convince her it’s unattractive and unladylike for girls to poop. FML
Today, my daughter said she would never ever have kids because then she'll bleed through her vagina or get stitches on her stomach. She turned 7 last week and learnt this at school from friends. I'm yet to have the "periods" talk with her. Now I'm scared to start it. FML
Today, my 17 year old asked me whether to chew or swallow grapes. I raised this dumbass. FML
Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, after my 7 year-old learned at school that water that goes down the sink and toilets is cleaned and then turns up in the taps as drinking water, he is now refusing to drink it at all in case it is recycled toilet water, and if he carries on he may need to be hospitalised for dehydration. FML
Today, my 6-year-old daughter barged into the bathroom while I was peeing, inspected the toilet and said, "You're well hydrated, good job." FML
Today, I caught my young daughter eating candy after brushing her teeth. Angry, I asked her if she wanted all her teeth to fall out. She smiled and said, “Yes!” FML
Today, my 5 year-old daughter watched me getting dressed in the bathroom and asked, "Mum, when my boobs grow, will they droop like yours?" FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Uremic poisoning will kill her. It won't come out of her mouth, it'll just go into her bloodstream and kill her. The human race will end up a little bit smarter if you dare her to try ;)
BeccaHugs 17
You mean it wouldn't?
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Comments (104)
Kkkdawg 27
When I started reading this, I thought the daughter was like 5, and I thought it was kinda cute..but then she was 17 and I was like, oh :/
Ray_of_midnight 23
Ask Tycho Brahe.
jagma_fml 14
she would be fine, it would fill the rather empty brain cavity ...
buddy51 23
OP tell her to look here. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tycho_Brahe#Death
cetlawizard 15
I'd have told her..."both"...but it'd come out of her mouth after she died.
BOBDUDE 0
Tell her it'll seep out of her skin and make her look tan. A week and a kidney failure later, problem solved.
jiraii 9
hopefully the apple falls far from the tree
Lil_Red777 21
Well it's kind of an interesting question. If you're nine.
hola147 3
Next time you're asked a dumbass question like that tell her to google it.
Ibeatmyself 3
That's how strippers are made