Today, I went to the restaurant where my date and I were supposed to meet. After half an hour he still hadn't arrived, so I texted him. He replied with a half-hearted apology and said he couldn't come because his cat had fallen asleep on his lap and he didn't want to wake it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a date with someone I met online. We agreed to meet at a nice restaurant. I got there early, ordered a drink, and waited. And waited. An hour later, I texted to ask where he was. His response? "I’ve been watching you from my car for the last hour. Decided you’re not my type." FML
Today, I finally had a date, my first one in well over a year. Everything was going good, until my date asked, "Do you like cats or dogs better?" When I responded cats, my date promptly got up and left, saying, "This isn't meant to be." FML
Today, I had a first date planned. He texted saying he was sick and couldn't make it. Two hours later, his Twitter account said otherwise. FML
Today, the guy I'm dating was supposed to come over. He would have if I hadn't fell asleep while he was waiting for me to open the door. FML
Today, I had a date at a formal restaurant I'm well known at. My date showed up two and a half hours late with a jogging suit on, and then got mad at me for ordering, eating, and paying without him. FML
Today, I woke up very excited because I was going on my first date with this guy I really liked. I dressed very nicely and went to where we were supposed to meet. I waited for about 2 hours. I called him to ask him where he was. He got angry because he was still sleeping and I woke him up. FML
Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML
Today, I was on a dinner date with a guy I really like. I guess I was on my phone too much because halfway through the date he sent me a text saying how much my half of the bill would be. FML
Today, I was sitting in the restaurant waiting for my blind date to come. I had sat for an hour until I finally got fed up and went to leave when at the same time the guy at the table next to me stood up to leave too. I noticed he had been sitting alone. Turns out he was my date. FML
Today, I dressed up for a date. After waiting for hours, sending countless texts and voice mails to my date, and thinking I'd been stood up, I remembered my date is actually scheduled for tomorrow. FML
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Top comments
Koalax3 18
I would've honestly asked him if i could go over so I could play with the cat.. But that's just me
booze_n_bitches 37
"Pleading cat" - a genuine excuse in my household to excuse oneself from any activity. I'm with him on this one.
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Comments (111)
Sydney1600 9
Makes sense!! Wouldn't wanna wake up a cat.
nphill82 21
Douchebag saved you a terrible date.
idealricetokidz 15
im guessing his excuse didnt work?
thebadguy85 10
Sounds legit.
ffiguresskating 11
I hate to say it but that's sweet and considerate of him but it depends on what your looks for in a date. Hope this gets better for you!
trumpetsk 13
I'd be the guy... My cat usually despises people so if he falls asleep on you then you better treasure it lol
writerchic85 26
So he's already pussy whipped
codeinechick 5
R u kidding us?
hiheyitschloe 13
I don't blame him, a sleeping cat is seriously adorable!
Brandon1000 10
Perfectly excusable