Today, during a intense orgasm I screamed, "You're my God!" at my husband. Afterwards, he told me I was blasphemous and reminded me that God smites those with false prophets. Needless to say, I think I'll just keep my mouth shut in the future. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was getting intimate with my husband, he moaned someone else's name. He actually tried to explain himself by saying that he'd had a "divine encounter," and while "possessed by the Lord," he'd been told the name of our future daughter. FML
Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML
Today, I found out how whipped I am when, at the climax of sex, I moaned, "I'm sorry!" FML
Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML
Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML
Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML
Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML
Today, things began to get hot and heavy between my boyfriend and me. Suddenly, in a deep, sexy voice, he whispered, "God help me for what I'm about to do." Thinking it was just an odd manner of dirty talk, I mumbled about liking it. He then farted very loudly. FML
Today, I was having the best sex with my husband, and right when I reached climax, he shouted "Abracadabra!" FML
Today, the guy I'm seeing and I were having sex. While I was having my orgasm, he looked at me and said "SHHHH!". FML
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Top comments
Lost Reggie 22
I think even God would slap him for saying stupid shit like that.
Justkidding100 41
YDI for marrying a freak
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Comments (8)
Lost Reggie 22
I think even God would slap him for saying stupid shit like that.
Justkidding100 41
YDI for marrying a freak
Skinyrd 17
So the husband is telling his wife off for being too good in bed? huh?
Wadlaen 24
Couldn't it be that you actually screamed at God and your husband is being blasphemous for believing you were addressing him?
L0life29 6
your husbands a tool
Andrea Remer 8
I would make sure to never make a sound ever again with him but be loud with my toys 😂
0rca 4
Tell him you are already smitten – with him.
MistressAfrodite 5
get a new husband 🤣🤣🤣