Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came home early from work. My boyfriend and I live together. I open the door and I found my best friend watching TV on the couch, wearing lingerie. The room smelled like sex. She acted irrational and defensive, and had the audacity to ask what I was doing here. Bitch, I live here. FML
Today, I found out that my best friend used the sexy dance moves she asked me to teach her to get into my ex-boyfriend’s pants. We dated for two years and broke up less than a week ago. FML
Today, I found my girlfriend in bed with her gym trainer. They said they were doing cardio. FML
Today, I came home from work to hear loud moans coming from the room that my husband and I share. I barged in and both he and this girl are scrambling around the room. He’s a music teacher and claimed he was giving her vocal lessons. That would make more sense had they both not been half naked. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
Today, I accidentally walked in on my roommate while she was changing clothes. She insisted on telling her boyfriend what had happened, because, "It wouldn't feel right" if she didn't. Her boyfriend is a MMA fighter/bodybuilder and has major jealousy issues. I'm screwed. FML
Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML
Today, I woke up at my crazy ex-girlfriend's house, naked and disoriented. You know, the kind of crazy like we-didn't-break-up-it-was-just-a-fight now-we-can-get-married crazy. She says everything's fine now and she's so glad we've "started our family." FML
Today, when I came home, my girlfriend was in sexy lingerie, and said it was a surprise for me. Sounds awesome, right? Too bad she was drenched in sweat and the room smelled like sex. I looked in the closet, only to get punched in the face by a naked guy. FML
Today, while heading to the bathroom, I saw my girlfriend putting some lingerie under my bed. I stupidly thought it was for some sexy time later. Well, later on, she dramatically "found" the lingerie and broke up with me. Almost everyone believes her story and thinks I'm a dirty cheater. FML
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Top comments
cyttex 13
What a douchebag and shitty friend
HairyPunisher 27
They had nowhere better to go than your apartment? Time for new friends, a new girlfriend, and new locks OP.
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Comments (145)
OhNoAGhost 18
I'll never understand people, I'm heartbroken just reading this. Sorry, OP.
pacmanman 15
Is there a reason it's not ex-best friend too? Cause anyone who would do that to me is most certainly NOT my friend... >.>
winimy 8
It's always worse when a friend betrays you. Sorry OP
LittleRed79 39
I'm gonna go with a silver lining here and say at least you didn't have to divorce her! That's always much more drawn-out (and expensive) than just kicking your cheating ***** of an ex-girlfriend to the curb. One day you'll see this as the win it is and thank her for the warning :)
mike7800 8
last week he taught her squats
sabine123_fml 5
Be glad you know the truth
metalhedcop 6
As someone who's had this same situation happen to me, I'm truly sorry OP. Neither one of them are worth any more than the time it takes rid your life of them. Just remember that you are valuable and you will find someone eventually who sees that and will show you every day. Sending positive thoughts your way in your tough time.
noideaforname 1
Since he taught her push-ups demonstrate to her how you punch a punching bag. Like okay she's a hoe but even girls have the moral " bros before hoes "
kalbrek009 20
I hope you showed them how you do "push outs" (where you take any keys they have to your place & "push them out the door")/out of your life.
Evil_Wench 16
"Today I was learning to do push-ups under the instruction of my bf's best friend. My bf came home early, thought I was cheating and kicked me out. FML" ...Seriously though, that sucks, OP. You deserve better.